A tribute to the best and greatest thread in the world: Off Topic

[Mr Mystery]

Crikey China O'blimey! (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-china-24957303)

That's a pretty significant development!

[Mr Mystery]

Crikey China O'Blimey Two! (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-china-24957303)

[Gotthammer]

Probably something to do with them noticing they've got around 20 million more guys than girls of young adult age and that wasn't really a viable future. But whatever the reason, all very significant if they follow through on it.

[Mr Mystery]

Follow through.

Hurr!

[Deadlift]

Bad lifty! Bad. In the corner for you, with no black pudding and hash brownsm, fired bread, fired egg, fried tomato, bacon sausage..damit!

Lol me and boy just got back. 2 sausages, 4 eggs, 4 bacon, black pudding, beans, 3 hash browns, mushrooms, fried bread and toast. No tomato as it's gross. Tea and orange juice. Boy ate nearly as much as me but not quite ;)

[Mr Mystery]

I would say no fair, but I have now rebalanced my level of Baconisation, on account I had a Butter and Bacon roll for Elevensies.

[Wolfshade]

Beans are gross :p.

[Psychosplodge]

Everyone knows its about the bacon, sausage and eggs. Everything else is just an add-on.

[Mr Mystery]

Yo mama gross :p.


http://ts4.mm.bing.net/th?id=H.4633630963663883&w=219&h=155&c=7&rs=1&url=http%3a%2f%2fhunch.com%2fitem%2fhn_2401564%2fo h-no-you-diint%2f&pid=1.7

[Psychosplodge]

Also while we aren't on it.
Nice to know the BBC are keeping up to date on stuff (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-24939873).

[Wolfshade]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-24939873


Also while we aren't on it.
Nice to know the BBC are keeping up to date on stuff (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-24939873).

Nice to see Splodgy is keeping up to date...

[Psychosplodge]

I missed that one, I was typing about the belltrap when it appeared :p

[Wolfshade]

I missed that one, I was typing about the belltrap when it appeared :p

Bell trap? (http://www.grainger.com/product/Bell-Trap-1WJR8?s_pp=false)

[Psychosplodge]

Is there a shinier version?

also

http://i44.tinypic.com/ioittk.jpg

[Deadlift]

Also while we aren't on it.
Nice to know the BBC are keeping up to date on stuff (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-24939873).

I'm a self confessed fan :o
My daughters getting some of the equestria dolls this Christmas amongst other things. The show really is rather good. I like that I can sit down with her and watch it and not have to endure some rehashed regurgitated garbage. Yep I guess I'm a Broney. Obviously "Big Macs" my favorite. Pinky pies fun too.

[Psychosplodge]

I'll tolerate your wrong opinion.
Everyone knows Fluttershy is best pony... :D

Pinkie is definitely amusing :)

Plus series four in a week and a bit!!!

[Mr Mystery]

See next year? I reckon I'm going to start collecting and painting up the entire Warhammer Forge monster range.

Already got their giant and Elemental of Beasts (gorgeous models both!)

[Psychosplodge]

Cool.

Is this in addition to the heresy character series?

[Wolfshade]

Is this in addition to the heresy character series?
If I could paint I would.

I am looking forward to Sanguinius, my cunning plan that I will never do, have 2, paint one as Sanguinius the other as the Sanguiniator. Yeah you saw what i did there. But given I can't paint and the cost is incredible I sha'n't.

[Kirsten]

man buys an iPad in tesco and the box contains clay instead, he gets arrested.

http://www.kitguru.net/apple/ipad-apple/matthew-wilson/man-arrested-after-complaining-his-ipad-was-switched-with-clay/

[Psychosplodge]

If I could paint I would.

I am looking forward to Sanguinius, my cunning plan that I will never do, have 2, paint one as Sanguinius the other as the Sanguiniator. Yeah you saw what i did there. But given I can't paint and the cost is incredible I sha'n't.

Well you don't need to eat every week right?


man buys an iPad in tesco and the box contains clay instead, he gets arrested.

http://www.kitguru.net/apple/ipad-apple/matthew-wilson/man-arrested-after-complaining-his-ipad-was-switched-with-clay/

See nothing good comes of buying apple products

[Wolfshade]

Well you don't need to eat every week right?
Depends how sucessful my hunting is, I have a whole deer in the deep freeze.

Also:

Outlook for Sunday to Tuesday
Sunday, cloudy with outbreaks of rain, clearing early Monday. Then becoming colder, with some showers, which are likely to turn to snow over the Peak District.

[Mr Mystery]

Cool.

Is this in addition to the heresy character series?

Probably not. Heresy stuff is going on hiatus for now with me! Will continue to get the books though.

[Mr Mystery]

Bit of a nice story for once (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-24953910).

Cheetahs killing livestock. Tribesmen don't kill Cheetahs. They chase them down, hogtie them, and hand them over to a wildlife sanctuary type thing.

[Deadlift]

Bit of a nice story for once (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-24953910).

Cheetahs killing livestock. Tribesmen don't kill Cheetahs. They chase them down, hogtie them, and hand them over to a wildlife sanctuary type thing.

How the hell do you catch a Cheetah, that's some fast moving tribesmen.

[Deadlift]

I had a result today, whilst packing I discovered about 40 metal greyknights under the bed. A bit dusty and the painting is shocking. But a quick soak in detol and I reckon I have more than enough to have a playable army. Even found 2 oop inquisitors in TDA too.

[Mr Mystery]

You found what in who???

What the hell were they doing there?

[Deadlift]

I found my 1st 40k army. Stored under the bed and long forgotten. Terrible painting but salvageable.

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

I had a result today, whilst packing I discovered about 40 metal greyknights under the bed. A bit dusty and the painting is shocking. But a quick soak in detol and I reckon I have more than enough to have a playable army. Even found 2 oop inquisitors in TDA too.

What? O_o

[DarkLink]

How the hell do you catch a Cheetah, that's some fast moving tribesmen.

Humans are some of the greatest endurance athletes in the animal kingdom. As far as I know, only wolves can outpace us over long distances. Maybe bears, too.

[Deadlift]

It's not that difficult to understand. I store a lot of my unused stuff under the bed. As I'm moving house I'm starting to haul this stuff out. Today I found a crap ton of forgotton minis. Amongst them loads of metal grey knights. I'm going to paint strip them and repaint them :D

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

Even found 2 oop inquisitors in TDA too.

I hope you didn't find anything in me you kinky b@stard. :p

[Kirsten]

after six hours at work, and then another six hours at work moving the entire shop's stock around, I am now sore and tired and hungry.

[Kirsten]

I believe I have discovered the essence of time travel. whilst in town tonight I passed two drunk chavs whose conversation proceeded thusly:

'I'm going to ****ing deck you'
'come on then'
'I'm going to ****ing deck you'
'come on then'
'I'm going to ****ing deck you'
'come on then'
'I'm going to ****ing deck you'
'come on then'
'I'm going to ****ing deck you'
'come on then'

and continued thus until I was out of earshot. clearly drunken chavs create some sort of temporal instability and they were trapped in a loop. if I can get enough drunk chavs together and harness that energy, I shall be unstoppable.

[Deadlift]

It's the usual, "if I shout louder and act more aggressive than you then you might get scared and back off trick" usually because neither party actually wants to get into a fight but can't lose face. Pathetic usual chav attitude.

[Lukas The Trickster]

It's the usual, "if I shout louder and act more aggressive than you then you might get scared and back off trick" usually because neither party actually wants to get into a fight but can't lose face. Pathetic usual chav attitude.

Indeed, its my observation that the ones who really will hit you don't tend to waste any time squaring up to you beforehand. Anything else is just usually bravado, particularly when alcohol is involved.

[eldargal]

Humans are some of the greatest endurance athletes in the animal kingdom. As far as I know, only wolves can outpace us over long distances. Maybe bears, too.

Yup. In terms of pure distance travelled (not including speed, in other words) I read we can outdistance any animal, bands of fit humans can travel 40km a day with minimal baggage, wolves 20 or so.

[Lukas The Trickster]

wolves 20 or so.

With or without baggage?

[Gotthammer]

I linked it before (I think) but this is quite relevant (http://friendlytroll.tumblr.com/post/57744848364/astrakiseki-prokopetz).

[eldargal]

With or without baggage?

Wolves have yet to invent the pawbag.

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

I am ready for a long weekend off. :D
(sun, mon, tues)

[Mr Mystery]

Nice.

I'm thinking of a painty experience weekend. Picked up a pot of Blood for the Blood God, and I'm going to try using it to create a flayed flesh affect on Bloodletters.

White undercoat, fleshy base coat, drybrushed up through the tones. Coat of Carroburg Crimson, Red Ink, and then BFTBG to finish.

[Santa]

Nice.

I'm thinking of a painty experience weekend. Picked up a pot of Blood for the Blood God, and I'm going to try using it to create a flayed flesh affect on Bloodletters.

White undercoat, fleshy base coat, drybrushed up through the tones. Coat of Carroburg Crimson, Red Ink, and then BFTBG to finish.

Sounds jolly well festive Mr Mystery, I approve. Well done young man.

[Mr Mystery]

Oh....it's you. I want a word with you, bunghole.

1987 I was a seriously good boy. All year. Even starting Christmas 1986. And all I wanted was Snake Mountain, to go with Castle Greyskull.

And nowt! What gives, fatso?

[Santa]

Must have been a mistake with the admin elves. I do apologise young man. Ho ho ho.

[Gotthammer]

Lies

http://i.imgur.com/Y2lLL3g.jpg

[Santa]

Young lady, Santa never lies. ;)

[Deadlift]

Oi there's only room for 1 jolly fatman here matey. Lol

[Gotthammer]

While you're here, Santa, care to explain this:

http://24.media.tumblr.com/1c3baf1c1bb402fffff696d5525cdea4/tumblr_mvyef0AnH31qghygto2_500.jpg

http://24.media.tumblr.com/88ef1f5c03ae2c90990d5ef91d63230a/tumblr_mvyef0AnH31qghygto1_500.jpg

Narf indeed...

[Mr Mystery]

While you're here, Santa, care to explain this:

http://24.media.tumblr.com/1c3baf1c1bb402fffff696d5525cdea4/tumblr_mvyef0AnH31qghygto2_500.jpg

http://24.media.tumblr.com/88ef1f5c03ae2c90990d5ef91d63230a/tumblr_mvyef0AnH31qghygto1_500.jpg

Narf indeed...

Want one!

[Santa]

Well my dear, anything that brings joy to the world is ok by me. My elves weren't however responsible for this lovely Christmas decoration. But if it brings beaming smiles to little ones then who can complain. Ho ho ho.

[Santa]

Hmmm it seems good old Santa has caused a bit of a stir. A few of my posts have already been sent to the moderators for approval. Looks like coal for some of the BoLs team this Christmas.

[Santa]

That's not how I attach the Reindeer to my sleigh. Looks jolly painful.

[eldargal]

Daddy still has the photos of you and he in Costa Rica in '78, if you don't want that **** going public then Swangina/Swan Queen needs to be a canonical thing by Christmas 2014. Merry Christmas.

[Santa]

Daddy still has the photos of you and he in Costa Rica in '78, if you don't want that **** going public then Swangina/Swan Queen needs to be a canonical thing by Christmas 2014. Merry Christmas.

Obviously an imposter young lady ;)

[eldargal]

How many imposters have access to cheap Elf labour.

P.S. Daddy sends his regards, says he'll see you at the club.

[DrLove42]

All I want is for world peace.

And my PhD supervisors to die in a fire.

[Mr Mystery]

I want the universe. On its knees before me.

Jump to it you big fattyboomboom

[Gotthammer]

This guy's big on excuses and denials isn't he?

[Santa]

Jump to it you big fattyboomboom

The way your eating young man your going to be quite the fattyboomboom yourself in a few short years :D

I was sure my joining the BoLs community would bring joy and happiness. Maybe Dakka Dakka would be a better choice ?

[eldargal]

Only if you are a masochist who enjoys being yelled at if you dare to point out maybe GW aren't actually the root of all evil in the world.

To be fair no one on Dakkadakka has pictures of you engaging in highly illegal and distasteful activities in Costa Rica in 1978 but we can chalk that up as outlier.

[Gotthammer]

'tis a local forum...

[Santa]

Only if you are a masochist who enjoys being yelled at if you dare to point out maybe GW aren't actually the root of all evil in the world.

To be fair no one on Dakkadakka has pictures of you engaging in highly illegal and distasteful activities in Costa Rica in 1978 but we can chalk that up as outlier.

I would remind you young lady, I do pay visits to people's homes whilst they sleep. ;)

[Gotthammer]

http://img.pandawhale.com/53467-Seinfeld-Elaine-cringe-gif-k0H9.jpeg

[eldargal]

I would remind you young lady, I do pay visits to people's homes whilst they sleep. ;)

Make Swangina/Swan Queen a thing and there will be no need for harsh measures.;)

[Mr Mystery]

Seriously dude.

She has Penis Flytraps. Supplied by Mystery Industries.

Mystery Industries. Don't say we didn't warn you.

[Kirsten]

a whole load of online training courses by microsoft and sony have suddenly become mandatory for Game employees to be done by monday. one of the questions, 'what colour is the PS4?' options
shiny and black
jet black
dark black
piano black

I would like to propose option e, 'the colour your eye will be when I find you mr question setter'.

[Wolfshade]

I believe I have discovered the essence of time travel. whilst in town tonight I passed two drunk chavs whose conversation proceeded thusly:

'I'm going to ****ing deck you'
'come on then'
'I'm going to ****ing deck you'
'come on then'
'I'm going to ****ing deck you'
'come on then'
'I'm going to ****ing deck you'
'come on then'
'I'm going to ****ing deck you'
'come on then'

and continued thus until I was out of earshot. clearly drunken chavs create some sort of temporal instability and they were trapped in a loop. if I can get enough drunk chavs together and harness that energy, I shall be unstoppable.

They probably made out after you were out of earshot.

[DrLove42]

a whole load of online training courses by microsoft and sony have suddenly become mandatory for Game employees to be done by monday. one of the questions, 'what colour is the PS4?' options
shiny and black
jet black
dark black
piano black

I would like to propose option e, 'the colour your eye will be when I find you mr question setter'.

Well apparantly the only thing you need to know for the PS4 is what to say when they all come back broken.

The amount of grief M$ caught for the RRoD on the 360, Sony will be getting a taste of

[Kirsten]

They probably made out after you were out of earshot.

I hope so


Well apparantly the only thing you need to know for the PS4 is what to say when they all come back broken.

The amount of grief M$ caught for the RRoD on the 360, Sony will be getting a taste of

well let's see what happens now that they are on general release. the initial reports are that problems are stemming from the first firmware update 1.5, so that will be simple enough to fix, not like the massive hardware failures the 360 suffered.

[Deadlift]

Karl Pilkington after witnessing child birth describing seeing the babies head coming out. "It looked proper weird, like it was wearing some sort of polo neck"

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

I go away for a day and Santa is on BoLS, dafq.

[Deadlift]

Yay, game of thrones is back on tv. Finally I get to catch up and watch season 3.

[Mr Mystery]

Ditto!!!

[Psychosplodge]

a whole load of online training courses by microsoft and sony have suddenly become mandatory for Game employees to be done by monday. one of the questions, 'what colour is the PS4?' options
shiny and black
jet black
dark black
piano black

I would like to propose option e, 'the colour your eye will be when I find you mr question setter'.

So which was it?


Karl Pilkington after witnessing child birth describing seeing the babies head coming out. "It looked proper weird, like it was wearing some sort of polo neck"

*shudder*


I go away for a day and Santa is on BoLS, dafq.

In November as well :rolleyes:

[Kirsten]

So which was it?



Jet Black. though I only got the answer by trial and error, can't actually find any description from Sony that doesn't just say 'black'

[Psychosplodge]

Jet Black. though I only got the answer by trial and error, can't actually find any description from Sony that doesn't just say 'black'
Oh, so you had to get them all eventually then?

Fascinating video


http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=9U8CZAKSsNA

[Psychosplodge]

Went back to Skyrim yesterday.
Now very nearly level 42. Running round in enchanted bits of legendary Nord armour. crafting and enchanting coming along well.
Archery is at 89 :D One handed is up there somewhere.
Still working on heavy armour...

[Wolfshade]

To celebrate reaching level 30 I visited the grey beards :)

You seem to already know the first word so here is the second.

Though whenever I enchant things I always have Sandal's (from DA) voice run thgouh my head as he shouts "Enchanting!"

[Deadlift]

I have played it to death. Completed it more than once and that includes all the non regenerating quests. My favorite character is a Khajit in Nightingale armour, skills in archery, one handed, sneak, light armour and anything else to help me be the best assasin I can be. Sneak up on dragons and one shot them with either bow or dagger. I can even stand right infront of enemies and they don't see me.

[Psychosplodge]

DA?

I'm chasing round mopping up side quests as they keep adding up by just wandering round, and the list is getting silly.

What is Nightingale armour? My sneak is getting that way, but not there quite yet.

[Wolfshade]

Dragon Age.

Yes, I made the mistake of trying to mop up side quests and so I would walk to new places or if on the way to a new place there was something to discover I did so and chatted/investigated and that spawned loads.

I've only just started to have glass armour dropping, but I can't build it, yet. My favourite weapon I have at the moment is a superior ebony bow that absorbs souls. Quite useful to sneak and hunt to fill those soul gems ready for some enchanting.

How my day is going:
http://i1288.photobucket.com/albums/b489/_wolfshade_/IMAG0864_zps215e5340.jpg

[Psychosplodge]

At least you have a bun.
I can't craft ebony yet, but my gauntlets, necklace, and ring of smithing I can still do a reasonable job of upgrading it. Need to build a new house though so I've got more dummies to store armour on.

[Wolfshade]

The muffin is no more :(, the paper clip was included for scale :D

[Psychosplodge]

At least you had a bun...

Even if it was tiny.

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

Apparently someone set work's kitchen on fire when I wasn't there. Dumbasses.

[Psychosplodge]

GODDAMMIT MOONMOON!
Not again...

[Deadlift]

Here is a picture of the Nightingale armour, you get it after completing all the Thieves guild quests.


http://i844.photobucket.com/albums/ab3/joenortonjones/35fdc755246484fb06fe429103cd0723.jpg

[Psychosplodge]

Ah that would be why I've never seen it.

[Deadlift]

It's best to get it after lvl 32. It's attributes are at its best then. Especially if you want to play a sneaky ******* like I love to do. Nothing can stop me in this game now. Don't know my lvl. 80ish I think, but im maxed out on all the relevant trees I need as well as black smithing.

The x 15dps and x30dps buffs from sneak and archery stack too. Get the Krosis dragon mask too if you can. That helps bunch too.

[Wolfshade]

My sneaking doesn't sound quite as good as yours DL, but I can remain undetected in dungeons long enough to get bonus damage from my bow.
Enchanting seems to grant far more experiance per action than smithing.

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

You know you've played Skyrim too much when you have a max level character.

[Deadlift]

My sneaking doesn't sound quite as good as yours DL, but I can remain undetected in dungeons long enough to get bonus damage from my bow.
Enchanting seems to grant far more experiance per action than smithing.

Illusion is a good spell tree to dabble in as Assassin.

[Psychosplodge]

Is there such a thing as too much?

I'm looking forward to the point where I've got the ability to double enchant.
I really need to improve my potions though.

[Mr Mystery]

Oh look. Lily Allen has a new (utterly terrible) song at No2.

Despite promising us she was retiring.

Not only untalented, and a mockney (posh in interviews, dropped vowels in songs), but also now a liar.

[Psychosplodge]

Because shes the first singer to do that?

I remember going to see Torval and Dean's farewell tour from them retiring from finger painting, and now they do dancing on ice :mad:

[Mr Mystery]

I just have a particular dislike for her family. None of them as talented as we're told they are.

[Psychosplodge]

I couldn't tell you who they are?

[Mr Mystery]

Alright for some :p

In other news...payday Friday, Dr Who Saturday.

WINNING COMBINATION!

[Psychosplodge]

You're doing it wrong

Payday Thursday
Series four saturday
Hopefully find it on youtube Sunday :D

[Mr Mystery]

Series 4 of what??? Game of Thrones or something?

[Psychosplodge]

My little pony: Friendship is magic :D

I am so excite.

[Mr Mystery]

Eewwww.....


Dirty

[Psychosplodge]

Says him watching a dude and his screwdriver.

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

You're all disgusting.

[Mr Mystery]

Says him watching a dude and his screwdriver.

It's a sonic screwdriver, not a phallic representation.

Plus, you know, the assistants. Phwoar! Especially the last two female ones.

[Psychosplodge]

You're all disgusting.

Shush you


It's a sonic screwdriver, not a phallic representation.

Plus, you know, the assistants. Phwoar! Especially the last two female ones.

So you say.
And you'd have to post pics for me to offer an opinion on any of his sidekicks.

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

I knew who Jenna Louise Coleman was before she was cool

[Psychosplodge]

Do not want :p

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

I would.

Also, skeleton horses are adorable.

[Psychosplodge]

Yeah I had one of those on red dead undead... Famine iirc?

[Wolfshade]

I knew who Jenna Louise Coleman was before she was cool

Maybe she should put a coat on if she is cool.

I have no idea who she is, any relation to David Coleman?

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

Yeah. But I'm building Tomb Kings

[Deadlift]

I would.

Also, skeleton horses are adorable.

Did you get Arvak the horse in skyrim ? It's from Dawnguard.

[Psychosplodge]

Oh yes him too.

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

Did you get Arvak the horse in skyrim ? It's from Dawnguard.

Yep, quirky little quest.

[Wolfshade]

I have no DLC :'( Christmas Steam Sale? yes please.

[Mr Mystery]

I be living off Pizza as of Saturday, on account it's ridiculously cheap to do so when home made.

Huzzah!

[Psychosplodge]

I have no DLC :'( Christmas Steam Sale? yes please.

The dawnguard expansion is really good.

[Wolfshade]

The dawnguard expansion is really good.

Not helping :p

[Kirsten]

The dawnguard expansion is really good.

it is excellent

always been a bit of a Jean Claude Van Damme fan, growing up watching 80s action films, love this ad, very very impressive


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j-b1q-Ea9E8

[Psychosplodge]

Not helping :p

Just saying if you only buy one... :D
and get hearthfire or whatever its called too.

[Kirsten]

so what you are saying is, if you only buy one, make sure it is all three...

[Psychosplodge]

Maybe. Though the not dawnguard one is kinda pissing me off.

[Kirsten]

Dragonborn. I liked it, though once you have it installed, the cultists can turn up at quite a low level and really ruin your day. when I started a new character I had to stand back and let the town guards kill them, which sucked.

[Psychosplodge]

So pretty...

http://i40.tinypic.com/2rzzx1g.gif

[Wolfshade]

Damn it I want all of them. And quite strangely I have a lot of cash in hand, but not much virtual cash :S

[Gotthammer]

So pretty...

Mmmmmm.... mercury...


Also, does anybody know a place where it's legal to marry a photograph because ow my heart (http://www.flickr.com/photos/mirrorimagegallery/4771155025/lightbox/) (and that's not just the mercury poisoning talking).

[Psychosplodge]

Mmmmmm.... mercury...




With extra sparkly reflected ceiling lights!

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

Looks a bit like Jennifer Lawrence. I totally would.

[Deadlift]

Looks a bit like Jennifer Lawrence. I totally would.

I expect she don't look like that now :D

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

http://hdwallpaper2013.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/Jennifer-Lawrence-Hot-Jennifer-Lawrence-HD-Wallpaper-1080x607.jpg

http://wallike.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/The-Hunger-Games-Katniss-640x400.jpg

Guess not.

[Deadlift]

Oh yes please.

I was thinking, most of us posting down here are doing so whilst at work. Is it any wonder the economy's in the **** at the moment. Lol I now suspect the whole countries workforce is currently chatting away on one forum or another regardless of the hobby it's dedicated to, be it wargaming or knitting, whilst they should be working :D

[Psychosplodge]

There's a lot of waiting in my job...

[Mr Mystery]

And I'm too dashed efficient at mine. That, and my mentees are solid little workers!

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

Katniss Everdeen. Mmmmmmmmmmmmm....

Well I'm currently off, so n'yeh.

[Wolfshade]

Slow system is slow.

However, I have posed a problem which has lead to some headscatching. I have observed data being displayed, but have no idea where it is stored. Indeed, the comprehensive (866-page) database deffinition documentation does not record where it is and according to the scheme historical information should be destroyed with only the last version being available.

It is a doosy of a problem.

[Psychosplodge]

Have you tried unplugging hardisks till you find it?

[DarkLink]

I inspect contractor's work, so most of the time I just sit around watching people dig holes. But contractors are like little kids, take your eyes of them for a second and disaster strikes. Or in our case, they do something stupid like pour DIs a foot to far into the road relative to curb and gutter. And, of course, it "wasn't our fault, we built it exactly how the staking told us to".

[Wolfshade]

Have you tried unplugging hardisks till you find it?

No, the tablespace is sat across a raid but I don't even know what the table name is.

What is DI?

[Psychosplodge]

Saw this, needed to post...

http://i41.tinypic.com/27x2xdl.jpg

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

Nice.

[DarkLink]

No, the tablespace is sat across a raid but I don't even know what the table name is.

What is DI?

Drain inlet. Contractors have abstrangeblanguage of acronyms and quasitechnical terms forall sorts of stuff that most people would just call 'that stuff next to the road'. "They got a bust at the hingepoint because of poor staking, so top back of walk was off and the DI is in the flowline" wouldn't be too unusual.

[Wolfshade]

...I do traffic engineering...

[Mr Mystery]

Careers Info in schools now acknowledged as being rubbish (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-24988338).

Which is something I could have told you around 20 years ago when I was coming up to my options. See, all they said was 'how about the police or the army....whereas I (ideally) wanted to be a film director. Yes, it was largely a pipe dream, but no attempt made to offer guidance on what qualifications, Universities and that might help realise that dream.

School careers advise has always been rubbish. And we wonder why modern kids have no ambition beyond 'get lucky, get famous'

[Gotthammer]

Careers Info in schools now acknowledged as being rubbish (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-24988338).

http://images.wikia.com/brutallegend/images/8/8c/You_Don't_Say.jpg

Yeah... my experience of the *ahem* guidance was very similar to yours Mystery. Though everyone kept telling me I should go into politics...

[Mr Mystery]

Yup. Belies a total lack of confidence in the students when you say 'really? Never going to happen. Thought about SHELF STACKING? Because face it, that's all you're good for'. Destroys self esteem when you're told you'll never fulfil your dreams. And worse, means many stop striving in school. After all, if you can't become what you want to be, why bother?

Whereas saying 'well, it's a hard road, but do this, take this turn, run here, jump, duck and you might make it' engenders a stronger work ethic, showing your dreams are possible, it just takes a helluva lot of hard work.

[Gotthammer]

Aye, I think a lot of people miss the difference between "you can be anything you want if you try" and "you should try to achieve what you want, and take what you learn from it as a positive even if you don't succeed".

[Kirsten]

And I'm too dashed efficient at mine. That, and my manatees are solid little workers!

hehehehehe


http://images.wikia.com/brutallegend/images/8/8c/You_Don't_Say.jpg

Yeah... my experience of the *ahem* guidance was very similar to yours Mystery. Though everyone kept telling me I should go into politics...

yeah, my recommended jobs according to a career quiz thing in school, grave digger, carpet fitter, or PE teacher.

[Mr Mystery]

Yup.

I feel schools should also offer alternative advice, for those who may need a break from the school environment. Whilst Primary/Secondary/6th Form/University is certainly the quickest route to a degree level qualification, it is by no means the only way, or indeed best way.

I got burned out at school, partially due to being one of their smartest kids, and a lack of challenge, but also because I'm pretty indolent when left to my own devices.

So I went out to work. And it sucked mightily for many, many years.

Had it been explained that there is nothing wrong with a couple of years out before returning to education (or even a decade out!), I could have approached things quite differently.

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

I wanted to be a Zoologist...

[Mr Mystery]

Then whatchoo waitin' for Willis?

Start making enquiries on how to qualimafy.

[Kirsten]

I wanted to be a contender

[Mr Mystery]

Then crack on!

Imagine that though. A 'yes, you can' attitude in our soceity. That'd be fantastic that would.

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

Then whatchoo waitin' for Willis?

Start making enquiries on how to qualimafy.

I have bills to pay.

[Mr Mystery]

As do we all. No reason not to put feelers out.

Adult Ed courses can be done (time allowing), and Open University is a superb option for the worker to further themselves.

[Deadlift]

If I could do things differently then either Chef or Phys Ed would have been two careers I could have happily pursued. As it was I did do 5 years as an operations technician for a telecommunications company. But the pull of the family business was too hard to resist. I'm content enough I guess, it's only sometimes I do wonder "what if".
Too late really now I guess. Too many mouths to feed.

[DarkLink]

I would've enlisted in the Marines, and used that to pay for college, rather than going to college and then trying to figure out Marines vs civil enginnering.

[Deadlift]

I just had to share this with you guys, my 3 year old has a habit of chewing on his toys. Unfortunately Buzz wasn't impressed.

http://i844.photobucket.com/albums/ab3/joenortonjones/e6bc4062961b180a0f0b9c0d473b55a6.jpg

I just spotted this latest mutilation and it made me laugh.

[Psychosplodge]

Careers Info in schools now acknowledged as being rubbish (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-24988338).

Which is something I could have told you around 20 years ago when I was coming up to my options. See, all they said was 'how about the police or the army....whereas I (ideally) wanted to be a film director. Yes, it was largely a pipe dream, but no attempt made to offer guidance on what qualifications, Universities and that might help realise that dream.

School careers advise has always been rubbish. And we wonder why modern kids have no ambition beyond 'get lucky, get famous'

Yeah it was crap at my school too.
If I was doing it again I'd definitely not go the uni route, and either make a proper go at joining the airforce like I'd always planned or


http://youtu.be/mL7n5mEmXJo

oh yeah monty python are doing a comeback tour! :D

[Wolfshade]

My career's advice was to be a brickie or baker.

Well the heavy snow, managed to get through it there must have been 5 maybe 6 flakes...

[Mr Mystery]

Yay for Python! Now, watch the scalpers hoover up the tickets and force normal people to pay through the nose.

[Psychosplodge]

Snow?
Well I did have to scrape the car this morning.

This needs to be watched with sound

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=yWi4ut0P5SE

[Wolfshade]

Oh, also, no water so I don't need to be at work.

[Psychosplodge]

?

stop ruining it mystery

[Mr Mystery]

Nearly the end of Movember, something which kind of irks me.

No, not the charity side of things. But the constant 'Mo this, Mo that' that keeps going on.

Remember children. Facial hair is for life, not just for charity.

Also, that Python thing....still only The Scum claiming it. Everyone else cites their article. And given that they're not what you might consider noted for their journalistic integrity or close relationship with the truth.....

[Gotthammer]

This needs to be watched with sound

Swear I posted this earlier... still totes amusing tho :D

[Psychosplodge]

Did you?
oops.

[Wolfshade]

Nearly the end of Movember, something which kind of irks me.

No, not the charity side of things. But the constant 'Mo this, Mo that' that keeps going on.

Remember children. Facial hair is for life, not just for charity.

Also, that Python thing....still only The Scum claiming it. Everyone else cites their article. And given that they're not what you might consider noted for their journalistic integrity or close relationship with the truth.....

I know, Mo Farrah has just taken it to the extreme (Also, Mo Mowlan and various locations in Norway).

[Gotthammer]

Did you?
oops.

Maybe? Might have forgotten to though - I do post a lot of stupid crap after all :p

[Psychosplodge]

No more than the rest of us. :D

[Mr Mystery]

I'd also like to share my pain.

You see, Watch are showing Babylon 5 from the beginning, so I've set up my Sky+ to record it. HURRAH!

Except....every ad break theres an ad for...a certain feminine hygiene product. Which contains the line 'What are you going to do, scratch it in the queue?'

Leaves me feeling a bit queasy.

[Psychosplodge]

Why not? We men do...

[Wolfshade]

Netflix need Babylon 5.

[Wolfshade]

Just been told to go home.

[Psychosplodge]

Its alright for some...

[Mr Mystery]

Here until 5:50 today.

[Psychosplodge]

oh I'm never there that late.

[Mr Mystery]

Got no choice this week. Team's on 10-6.

Sadly, this doesn't mean a lie in for me, as last coach up to town is at 7:07, getting me in roughly 8:30....

[Wolfshade]

Follow up e-mail. Don't come into work unless you hear otherwise.

[Mr Mystery]

Wolfie been sacked?

[Psychosplodge]

So if there's no water you get the day off?

[eldargal]

Just a few days until the PC version of Assassins Creed 4 is ready to play *flails excitedly* Pre-loading now...

[Mr Mystery]

Thought you'd already completed that one? And say it was so-so in the beginning?

And on the subject of computery games....

Tomb Raider, the latest one. I understand the story is good. But is it enjoyable enough for a casual gamer to bother with?

[eldargal]

That was AC3 and it improved.:)

I think so, I really loved Tomb Raider and the story was the main draw as fun as the gameplay is.

[Mr Mystery]

Shall likely pick it up then.

All these AC games confuse me. A lot.

[Psychosplodge]

You've played one you've played them all. And woe betide if you want to go over that invisible line in the sand...

[eldargal]

It's quite simple:

Assassins Creed
Assassins Creed II
Assassins Creed Brotherhood
Assassins Creed Revelations
Assassins Creed III
Assassins Creed: Liberation
Assassins Creed IV

:p

Not including some o fthe small games for weird platforms I think.

[Mr Mystery]

http://www.365horrormovie.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/scanners-headexplode.jpg

[Deadlift]

Brotherhood was easily my favorite, the others haven't improved enough in gameplay to be worth buying (for me). What came after was just too much of a reboot and not different enough. Storyline aside ofc.

[eldargal]

AC2 and Brotherhood have been my favourites so far with Brotherhood ahead due to adapting to PC controls better. I have hopes of IV though, it seems to be focusing on the things III did well and has apparently remedied the things it didn't.

[Wildeybeast]

4 is as good as three was bad. They have fixed/removed everything bad (e.g. Connor; Desmond) from Ac3 whilst adding some lovely new touches. For example, the stupid bits of paper you chased round boston for no reason are still there, but now they are sea shanties and catching them unlocks a shanty that your crew will actually sing as you sail around. Basically it's awesome. Up there with 2, though a very a different style of game. Essentially you free roam (sail) round the Caribbean, shooting up spaniards and boarding their ships. And fighting sharks. You can then simply jump off your ship and explore tropical islands and fight crocodiles. (Pro tip: don't fight crocodiles.) and when you get bored of all this, you can wander into town and stab some fools in the spine in true ac style. But dressed as pirate. Which is amazeballs.

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

It is definitely the best Pirates of the Caribbean game that I have ever played.

[Deadlift]

It is definitely the best Pirates of the Caribbean game that I have ever played.

I preferred Disneys Infinitys version :D

[Tzeentch's Dark Agent]

Naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah lad. Lego PotC.
Or Kingdom Hearts.

[DrLove42]

Lego PotC was awesome.

I would have been getting it for my new Xbox this week. But GAME are useless feckin tits and so i won't be getting one now

[Wolfshade]

Lego games are awesome.

Water is reconnected at work, back to the coal face tomorrow.

[Psychosplodge]

At all Doc?

[Deadlift]

Ok you buggers, I'm currently watching Event Horizon. Some of you have said in the past how good it is, and how close it is to 40k lore. What you neglected to tell me was how bloody scary it is. I'm bloody terrified.

[Kirsten]

I love Event Horizon, such a good film

[Mr Mystery]

I didn't like it.

I shall be in the corner of shame.

[Psychosplodge]

I can't remember it, though I'm sure I've seen it.

[Psychosplodge]

Hull announced as city of culture

ROFLAMO

[Mr Mystery]

I'm not laughing.

There's someone in the office who has been repeatedly spinning a coin on their desk for the past hour.

This is beyond annoying. Especially as I can't see who it is.

This is almost as bad as whistling in the office. I can't stand it. It's distracting, it's disruptive, and frankly it shows you're not working or concentrating anywhere near hard enough.

[Psychosplodge]

You would if you'd spent any time in Hull.

Join in, do it louder, faster, and more irritatingly. I suggest a £2 coin for maximum annoyance.

[Mr Mystery]

You would if you'd spent any time in Hull.

Join in, do it louder, faster, and more irritatingly. I suggest a £2 coin for maximum annoyance.

If I had a £2 coin, I'd have hired an exceedingly cheap hitman for this one by now.

[Psychosplodge]

It probably wouldn't be a very good one for that price

[Mr Mystery]

As long as they're able to get across the gist of my annoyance, I'd be happy.

[Psychosplodge]

You considered standing on your desk and expressing your annoyance verbally?

[Deadlift]

If I had a £2 coin, I'd have hired an exceedingly cheap hitman for this one by now.

Sometimes a bit of DIY is far more satisfactory than paying for a professional ;)

[Psychosplodge]

I must recommend this (http://www.amazon.co.uk/Ready-Player-One-Ernest-Cline/dp/0099560437/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1384945746&sr=8-1&keywords=ready+player+one) book

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51L4KqFa5AL._BO2,204,203,200_PIsitb-sticker-arrow-click,TopRight,35,-76_SX385_SY500_CR,0,0,385,500_SH20_OU02_.jpg

Just read it over the last two evenings. Absolutely brilliant. Couldn't put it down.

[Gotthammer]

Now I know nobody's posted this yet :p


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sv3py3Ap8_Y


Leonardo Da Vinci’s wacky piano is heard for the first time, after 500 years:
A bizarre instrument combining a piano and cello has finally been played to an audience more than 500 years after it was dreamt up Leonardo da Vinci. Da Vinci, the Italian Renaissance genius who painted the Mona Lisa, invented the ‘‘viola organista’’ - which looks like a baby grand piano – but never built it, experts say.

The viola organista has now come to life, thanks to a Polish concert pianist with a flair for instrument-making and the patience and passion to interpret da Vinci’s plans. Full of steel strings and spinning wheels, Slawomir Zubrzycki’s creation is a musical and mechanical work of art.
‘‘This instrument has the characteristics of three we know: the harpsichord, the organ and the viola da gamba,’’ Zubrzycki said as he debuted the instrument at the Academy of Music in the southern Polish city of Krakow. The instrument’s exterior is painted in a rich midnight blue, adorned with golden swirls painted on the side. The inside of its lid is a deep raspberry inscribed with a Latin quote in gold leaf by 12th-century German nun, mystic and philosopher, Saint Hildegard.

‘‘Holy prophets and scholars immersed in the sea of arts both human and divine, dreamt up a multitude of instruments to delight the soul,’’ it says.
The flat bed of its interior is lined with golden spruce. Sixty-one gleaming steel strings run across it, similar to the inside of a baby grand. Each is connected to the keyboard, complete with smaller black keys for sharp and flat notes. But unlike a piano, it has no hammered dulcimers. Instead, there are four spinning wheels wrapped in horse-tail hair, like violin bows.


To turn them, Zubrzycki pumps a pedal below the keyboard connected to a crankshaft. As he tinkles the keys, they press the strings down onto the wheels, emitting rich, sonorous tones reminiscent of a cello, an organ and even an accordion. The effect is a sound that da Vinci dreamt of, but never heard; there are no historical records suggesting he or anyone else of his time built the instrument he designed. A sketch and notes in da Vinci’s characteristic inverted script is found in his Codex Atlanticus, a 12-volume collection of his manuscripts and designs for everything from weaponry to flight.

‘‘I have no idea what Leonardo da Vinci might think of the instrument I’ve made, but I’d hope he’d be pleased,’’ said Zubrzycki, who spend three years and 5000 hours bringing da Vinci’s creation to life.

[Psychosplodge]

But how do they know they're tuning it right?

[Gotthammer]

I expect that took some experimenting :p

[DarkLink]

http://www.thewire.com/entertainment/2013/09/zach-galifianakis-says-everything-adults-have-been-wanting-say-justin-bieber/69907/

[Psychosplodge]

I saw something saying his tickets have more or less stopped selling in Oz.

[Deadlift]

http://www.thewire.com/entertainment/2013/09/zach-galifianakis-says-everything-adults-have-been-wanting-say-justin-bieber/69907/

Brilliant, can we get him to interview Miley Cyrus next ?

[Mr Mystery]

Let's hope it's the end of his insipid career.

Remember folks. It's OK to sell sex to children as young as 8, as long as nobody actually whips their tackle out or says any naughty words, because then it would be weird and wrong.

[Psychosplodge]

If we're lucky it is.

Anyway. When do we start bombing spain (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-25021640)?

[Wolfshade]

Send in the fleet.

Also notice how spain rarely talks about it's property in north africa...

[Psychosplodge]

Wolfie! Know anything about these needle attacks in birmingham?

[Wolfshade]

Only what has been reported on the media.

http://www.birminghammail.co.uk/news/local-news/birmingham-needle-attacker-could-struck-6320843

for some context the location where he is operating is a road called broad street, that is where all the trendies congregate and drink their larger and dance to the top 10 from the hit parade.

It seems wierd as the people who have come forward have had blood tests and are negative, so they are either lucky or guy is "clean". It is all rather worrying.

[Psychosplodge]

A bit more informative than the BBC link.

[Wolfshade]

The whole thing is a bit weird.

[Psychosplodge]

Yeah, but at least if we want to go in the day it'll probably be ok didn't really get that from what I'd read on BBC...

[DarkLink]

I've heard some urban legends about sticking diseased needles under gas nozzle handles at gas stations lately.

[Wolfshade]

No reason to go to Broad Street, it is quite a distance from the German Markets if you are planning to visit for some gluvien.

[Psychosplodge]

IDK I just drive the wench places and follow/carry while she shops. Luckily she doesn't shop too female :D

Dark wouldn't that be quit easy to see?

[Deadlift]

I've heard some urban legends about sticking diseased needles under gas nozzle handles at gas stations lately.

Years ago my brother was a security guard for a shopping centre called the Haldon Centre in Torquay. One of his more delightful tasks was moving on the druggies that used to hang out in the stairwell leading up to the multi-story car park. What these idiots used to do in retaliation was stick their used needles with chewing gum underneath the handrails in this stairwell. Lovely don't you think.

Unfortunately rather indiscriminate in who could get a jab from them.

[Mr Mystery]

No reason to go to Broad Street, it is quite a distance from the German Markets if you are planning to visit for some gluvien.

http://ts2.mm.bing.net/th?id=H.4764197955307601&w=94&h=139&c=7&rs=1&pid=1.7

[Mr Mystery]

Nearly 80 year old mural of historic value now accused of racism (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-edinburgh-east-fife-24999917)

Left wing as I am, I think someone needs to hush.

1) It's historical. It's not as if someone has created in the modern day
2) It's just a painting
3) It can be of great use to explain racism, and changing values, to very young children.

[Wolfshade]

I'm back, did you miss me?

Bust a spoke again on the way into work this morning.

Bad times.

[Psychosplodge]

Terribly, anyone missing slows things down, and then i get bored and actually have to do stuff instead.

[Wolfshade]

Like destroy the stadium? you monster you.

[Psychosplodge]

I wish I'd gone into demolition when other stuff didn't work. Destroying stuff is fun.
I still don't understand how they can anyway considering its still got a £25m mortgage against it...

[Wolfshade]

So, you wish to reposess my pile of rubble, go on then, you just have to make sure it is off my land before sun fall...

[Psychosplodge]

Just more council corruption as usual.

[Mr Mystery]

Land itself is likely highly valuable, so they'd reposess that I'd imagine.

[Psychosplodge]

It's not that much though, we aren't in London...

[Wolfshade]

Depends if they retained the rights to the land, and the building was lease hold.

[Psychosplodge]

Well if you're going to **** up, do it in style

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=6FNg-B7h4OA

[Kirsten]

awesome


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TN8YQVM1GQI#t=1

[Psychosplodge]

oops (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-25032380)

[Psychosplodge]

Look at this bloke go

http://i41.tinypic.com/14nrih.gif

[Mr Mystery]

Ah France. sometimes you amuse! (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/blogs-magazine-monitor-25038456)

[Kirsten]

six hours down, only eight to go, hurrah...

[Mr Mystery]

16 minutes for me :p

[Kirsten]

various well known french figures made promises to do things if France won their game against Ukraine and qualified for the next world cup not thinking they would win. France won 3-0 and qualified, so it was time for bets to be fulfilled, my favourite:

"Marc Dorcel, a French producer of pornographic films tweeted an hour before the game that all of his movies would be available for free during the entire night on his website. Twenty minutes after the game started, his post had been retweeted more than 700 times, and 45 seconds after the team's victory, Dorcel's website was inaccessible due to heavy traffic."

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/blogs-magazine-monitor-25038456

[Mr Mystery]

Already posted above. :p

[Kirsten]

Already posted above. :p

mine was better, it had quotes and everything...