Can you give me feedback on my battle report? :)

[Tommie Soule]

After the council with the Celestial Dragon Monks Thaindon felt the need for haste!
His mission for the good of the world, nay, all of ulthuan, was hindered with portents grim.
"All hope of secrecy is now abandoned!" Thaindon cursed "We are not the only ones aware of the Stone and neither are we the only ones seeking it!"
Idaniali Listened to the mages case. "We must head for the road and make for the seas and gather the rest of our forcese there. Send message to our other forces that the Dark Bretheren are about the mountains near the ancient giant lands"
His head for war and cool manner, even for an elf, was why he was the figure head of Silver Phoenix Army Banner.
Thaindon raised an eyebrow at him "absurd! You would risk discovery" he stated matter of factly. " There are more immeadiate threats than our blighted kin, you know that"
"I do not have anything to fear of the lesser races and neither does this force. our skills are second only to Tyrion himself's own grand army".
He smiled at Thaindon casually, which accentuated his almond shaped eyes and sharp features "any way risk is a part of war and a thrill to the soul, you should indulge yourself at least once before the end times"
"I will endulge when our world is safe cousin and not before" Thaindon turned and left to gather his acolytes, the feeling in his gut was not one to savour....

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"Ogres lord! A patrol from the mountains must have caught our scents!" The scout reported.
Idaniali's eyes twinkled and a pleased smile pursed his lips "Ready the wings of the Phoenix, Sound the call!"
A pure note sounded clarion. Every warrior of the Silver Phoenix efficiently and gracefully ceased whatever fancies they were at and formed up in one fluid motion.
They were ready.
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[Tommie Soule]

The Ogres came from the west crudging steadilly at first, or in the case of the massive Sky Titan cannon, trundling and snorting.
'Large as they are they are but few' thought Idanieli. 'but fast!' as the Ogre force surged.
He also noted with a slight sadness the desecrated but fine wrought works of another of the eldar races, a cannon of the Sky Titans.
The docile horned beast hauled the mouth of the fantastic bombard towards Idaniali's lines
BOOOOOOM!
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Instead of usual 'RARK WHOOSH CRUMP' of cannon fire Idaniali expected, the right flak of the opposing force was consumed in white hot fire.
'Serves them right' A smug and satisfied grin blossomed on Idanials face as he looked over at his cousin.
"This will be easy!" he shouted. Though Thaindon still did not look impressed
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*That is not funny cousin and they are still coming* Thaindons mind link twittered in his head distracting him.
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A distraction he didn't expect! and it cost im dearly! "FIRE!" he yelled too late "For the love of Asuryan bring them down!"
To the ogres the arrows seemed like tiny shards of wood raining around them and boucing just as harmlessly of thier skin.
This would have to come down to blades and the masters of such stepped forward to do thier duty.
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Horror smote Idaniali's face as the sheer power of the things crushed his finest Warriors and splintered the phoenix claw bolt caster! !

[Tommie Soule]

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Idanieli cursed his cousins imperfections with aeons old profanities. 'how could his scorcery have cost us so much!'
As his mind whirled in fury he noticed the fleeing form of his now hated cousin.
'How could he!' his mind raged as his sharp and delicate features were troubled with bulging veins.

Thaindon fled. Leaving his commander and cousin to his foolish skirmish.
*I must deliver word. The Tribes march for war. Goodbye cousin*.
As he severed the mind link with his cousin Thaindon heard a far off concussive sound and what he could only describe as a 'nudge'.
He looked down to see he bled, and not like the bleeding that he remembered in his tapestry lessosns as a clumsy needle wielding youth.
Gore soaked him. Pain Wracked him. Chunks of flesh fell of him.
n the distance he saw his reapers, smoke curling from the cannons the held.
He wept 'what have they done! our world will end. why can't they understand.....' and died
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With the death of his cousin and the butchering of his finest warriors Idaniali Sneered at the Ogre which appeared to lead the rabble.
"I will not leave here without your blood on my hands"
Idaniali charged to his death that day.
His own hubris killed him, his cousin and his army.





Tommie Soule/Mike Mee (ogres/high elves) - 1000pts



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[Wildeybeast]

Ok, just my personal views, feel free to disagree/ignore. I like the angles for your pictures, though they look rather blurry on here. Not sure whether that is the forum or if a better resolution camera would help. I personally don't like the character narrative style of battle report. I like an account of what the players did, ideally told from their separate POV's or that of an observer who makes independent comments.

[Chronowraith]

I don't think the photos look blurry personally but you definitely need to watch your lighting. Some photos are washed out and others have a yellow tint to them. Consider buying daylight bulbs for yor gaming space, using light filters on the camera, or just being more cognizant of the lighting when you snap photos.

I agree with Wildey... I'd much rather read what actually happened during the battle as far as movements, combats, and other events around the field. Throwing in the odd fluff blurb is fine here and there but it makes for a poor battle report if people have all that information and still have no clue what happened.

As such, keep in mind people don't want a wall of text either. Use the photos to break up the text and write in more of an article style than a technical document style. Also, have a little fun and interject a little humor, these are games after all.