We're All Trolls Now

[Drunkencorgimaster]

Since it is fairly hard to spend much time on a forum (including our beloved BOLS) without being accused of being a troll at some point, I thought up an interesting game. Let us embrace the horror.

Just for the fun of it, what would be your best 40k trolling line? What comment, question, or phrase would send the so-called "fanboys" into a rage? How much chum would you need to toss out of the boat before the sharks bite?

Suggested guidelines for this post:

1) This is for fun. Feel free to say things that you do not actually agree with, but that would make good bait.

2) This is for fun. Remember that the posts are humorous attempts to come up with good troll lines. If you don't agree with them, there is no point in trying to respond to their specific comment. The joke will be on you. You will be like a bird attacking its reflection in the window.

3) This is for fun. I am not actually trolling right now.

So go ahead and release your inner troll...let the games begin.:D

[LordGrise]

Sure, I'm down with this.

::grin:: There's no real difference in play style between Orc and Space Marine armies. IMHO.

Oh yeah, and Tau rock, especially when you got a full six feet of table between you and the nastiness trying to close to melee.

[Image]

Tyranids are OP and need a nerf. They just destroyed my Grey Knights. 24" shooting that doesn't need LoS and then monstrous creatures that entirely shut down my psychic powers?! WTF?!

I'm playing GREY KNIGHTS! Why are nids totally designed to just screw over GK!? I own everyone else, so don't say I'm bad.

[DarkLink]

3) This is for fun. I am not actually trolling right now.


I label you a liar.

[ToBeWilly]

Matt Ward is AWESOME!!!! He totally understands this game, and the fluff, like no other.

[Lockark]

Your army needs more Melta Guns.

[Bigred]

You're all very, very naughty people.

That said, proceed...

[Grimnar42]

Squats are making a comeback totally awesome

[Uncle Nutsy]

man, i don't know where you guys learned how to troll, but it's just horrible.

and the moderators here have no idea what they're doing. I've seen monkeys do a better job.

fluff for all the armies is just useless filler and has no place in the game. who cares what a little plastic man has done in a book.

and 40k is one of the cheapest hobbies ever.

[fuzzbuket]

i found this great vidioe on dippind: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tg4u7ko333U andd thats how im goiing to win a GD because normal painting is not good enogh.

part 2:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MsDugITBANI


-fuzz

p.s. tau are proken and OP
daemons are OP
eldar are OP
space marines are OP
orks are OP
chaos marines are OP
jervis johjnson is OP
sisters of battle are OP
dark eldar are OP
IG are OP
space wolves are OP
blood angels are OP
dark angels are OP
spaqts are OP
black emplars are OP
the emperor is OP
tomb kings are OP
meltaguns are OP
bigred is OP



I LOVE Dakka

[isotope99]

Behold, my WIP vindicare assassin with advanced stealthsuit. All I need to do is texture the base and paint on the three colour minimum and it'll be tournament ready. :D

The great thing about this model, apart from the skillful conversion work, is that with TLOS it's really easy to protect from enemy fire. :cool:

http://www.games-workshop.com/MEDIA_CustomProductCatalog/m2050599_99229999078_Base25mmRoundClosed_445x319.j pg

I don't need to provide any evidence to support my outrageous views, my obvious greatness is proof enough!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don't need to have won any games to know that my army list is the best and yours is rubbish, my superior skill means actually fighting the battle is redundant!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[MajorWesJanson]

Plastic Thunderhawk confirmed at GD Germany.

[DrLove42]

Everything Melissa says is perfectly fair and reasoned, balenced banter


Girls don't play 40K! And when they do they hide behind their boobs!

[eldargal]

Pfft, your mum's* a troll.


You forgot the inflatable SoBs.


Plastic Thunderhawk confirmed at GD Germany.


Eldar are gay and everyone who plays Eldar is also gay and by gay I don't mean happy I mean they like inserting <CENSORED BY THE INQUISITION>.


*amusing typo of the day, wrote nun's instead of mum's.

[MaltonNecromancer]

Eldar are gay and everyone who plays Eldar is also gay and by gay I don't mean happy I mean they like inserting <CENSORED BY THE INQUISITION>.

In the grim darkness of the far future, there is only heterosexuality?

You know, unless we're talking about SoB; girls doing it is okay.

[JxKxR]

Squats are making a comeback totally awesome

You win.

[gwensdad]

All squad markings on all Imperial units are based on American military designations-especially those used in WWII.

(I know someone who's doing their army markings for BA based on this concept)

[Denzark]

Unlucky all you feminist biatches Space Marines are all male hahahah...

[MaltonNecromancer]

Unlucky all you feminist biatches Space Marines are all male hahahah...

Unlucky all you tiny-in-the-pants, compensating-for-it chavuinist pigs, the new Sisters of Battle codex is one of the best designed, most hypercompetitive builds that will easily...

Sorry, couldn't even get to the end of that without crying. :(

Oh, well at least we still have one all-female army. That's right: Orks. At least the Orks are all female. After all, they all give birth, so they must all have ladyparts.

Yup. Even the Warboss. Hers is the shoutiest.

[Emperorsmercy]

I prefer playing 40k to Warmachine.

^Nerdrage waiting to happen.

[Aldramelech]

You all need to grow up and stop playing with toy soldiers!

[murrburger]

Tau, Sisters and Necrons shouldn't be real armies.

[fade_74]

IG suck
(new IG codex)
IG ROXXors ive played them faithfully for 15 years.

Dark eldar suck!
(new dark eldar codex)
DE are the best! Ive played them faithfully for 15 years!

Deamonhunters suck
(new grey knights codex)
Grey knights are the bomb! ive played them for 15 years!

Necrons suck
(New necron codex)
Necrons are awesome! Ive played them faithfully for 15 years!

I love these guys! They all have warhouses of miniatures apparently. And 9 26 hour days in their week to play all those games with all those things. I wish they would just give over though and say "Yeah, I'm that tourney playing guy with no imagination. I have to find what's newest and bestest on the net so I can have that competitive edge. Painting mini's? Oh yeah...I have that goat guy barf on my expensive models and call it good. Oh yeah....he barfed on my 400 dollar army case too."

[Deadlift]

It's "just a game" and "the fluff isn't real"

[Gotthammer]

Unlucky all you feminist biatches Space Marines are all male hahahah...

I'll see you bringing up FSMs and raise you:

"You should read my fan-fic with female space marines of the Rainbow Warriors chapter (http://collegiatitanica.blogspot.com/search/label/Angels%20of%20Light)"

:D

[idget]

Oooh TFD thread!

Tim Kirby is dead, goodnight sweet prince

[MaltonNecromancer]

Every single heterosexual male 40K player wishes this was their life.

http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm9/damaddok-junk-pile/Warhammer%2040k/lovecanbloom.jpg
And don't scroll any lower, or you'll see the most horrific, awful, mind-meltingly appalling, grotesque iimage; it's the worst thing any true fan, any real, red-blooded 40K can imagine:









...








....









.....
http://img37.imageshack.us/img37/4067/3b9a5829a710c624633c307.jpg

AAAAHHH! Why did you look? WHY DID YOU LOOK??!!!



Wait, what's that you say?

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_YkK_9KlnoyQ/TVIpz5_lRjI/AAAAAAAAABc/T2D5J7crdaQ/s1600/faipa+trio3.jpg

Oh no, somebody's already sculpted some! And they don't look cool at all! I don't want anything that looks like that for my army! That would be awful! My marines hate stupid girls, they hate them! With their flowers and pretty bows in their hair and their stupid, stupid "My Little Pony"! And the fluff, the fluff says I'm right, THE FLUFF SAYS I'M RIGHT!

[Necron2.0]

Disclaimer reminder: This is for fun, remember, and views expressed do not reflect the poster's actual opinions.

***

There are no female models because the very concept is asinine. Women have no place on the grim dark battlefield of the future ... or any battlefield for that matter. Women cannot fight. The only role for a woman in a warlike society is to manufacture munitions and pump out more warriors.

There are only three types of Sororitas - lipstick lesbians, bull-dykes or cross-dressing Space Marines. That's why they're all into the flaming things.

***

Note: see disclaimer

[fade_74]

If you were bio engineering female super soldiers why would you even give them breasts?

[eldargal]

I think the question is 'why wouldn't you give them breasts'.:rolleyes: <-not trolling


Answer, because breasts are stupid. <---trolling.

[Jive Tyrant]

If you were bio engineering female super soldiers why would you even give them breasts?

You'd put an extra one on the back, for dancing.

(extra points if you can identify that quote without googling it)

[Xas]

Man is GW stupid with all that Horus Heresy crap? I wish they would concentrate on putting out more of these awesome films like instead of wasteing their time with crappy written books about stuff that isn't even really part of Warhammer 40.000. Hell, it is called Warhammer 40.000 for some reason and that reason means everything before the 40. millenium doesn't exist!

**extra points for everyone who gets every hook in that worm xD**

[BuFFo]

Just like the rest of you...

+1

I just don't hide my intentions.

[fade_74]

Just like the rest of you...

+1

I just don't hide my intentions.

Good boy Buffo! Here boy! Have a nice juicy steroid treat! K...back in your cage. That's a goood boy.

[DAPHEEL]

What the **** is the deal with that SOB codex! I mean my freind gets d6 faith points per turn in his 3000pts apocalypse army? D6!!! seriousley? That's way too many - It's an average of 3-4 per turn, he's gonna tear things apart!
Those characters are brutal, I mean I've got to shoot them with strength 6 weapons at a minimum, A MINIMUM! in order to kill them - how am I meant to get that many strength 6 weapons in a list?

As for the penitant engines, don't get me started to them, armour 10, open topped, with a 6+ invunerable save - How's anybody meant to take them down? Well at least they don't get smoke launchers.

The sisters repentia can now go in transports too! - There was nothing more terrifying then facing a table full of them - we all remeber those days.

Who wrote this monstrousley overpowered 'dex? was Matt Ward high? 6+ invunerable save for EVERYTHING?
All for free in a white dwarf that's already packed with fascinating, well written and inciteful articles!

All I can say is I can see a lot of thunderwolf cavalry going up on e-bay soon.

[silashand]

Because, among the people who read this forum, you are granted the same respect as would be granted, say, your average root fungus. Not only are your language skills highly suspect, not only do you refuse to answer the most basic of questions about your qualifications and/or background, not only are you posting from your Blackberry, you are annoying, your information is often wrong or unsubstantiated, and you have this air of blithe idiocy that makes people with more than eight operating neurons want to put you in a small envelope and mail you back and forth between people in Washington, D.C. until the Post Office finally sticks you in some pile of undelivered mail, where you would then remain until the weight of accumulating mail compresses you into a small lump of peat, at which point you would be ground into mulch and spread over someone's garden, thus gaining in death what you failed to obtain in life; a useful purpose on this planet.

Have a nice day.

Cheers, Gary

[DAPHEEL]

Silashand gets my vote. Best troll ever, and he's a dwarf - they don't even like trolls.

[silashand]

Thanks :). How about something to help folks out with trolling, eh?

==========Begin Flame==========

Dear:

[ ] Clueless Newbie
[ ] Lamer
[ ] "Me too" er
[ ] Pervert
[ ] Spammer
[ ] Nerd
[ ] Elvis
[ ] Fed
[ ] Freak
[ ] Scientologist
[ ] Scammer
[ ] Dumbass
[ ] Pre-teen
[ ] Obnoxious Advocacy Freak
[ ] Paranoid Mutant
[ ] Brain-dead liberal/conservative/communist/whatever

You Are Being Flamed Because:

[ ] You posted about Warhammer in a 40K forum
[ ] You posted something asking for where to download illegal rulebooks/army builder/whatever
[ ] You quoted an ENTIRE post in your reply
[ ] You continued a long, stupid thread
[ ] You started/continued an off-topic thread
[ ] You posted a "YOU ALL SUCK" message
[ ] You posted a blatantly obvious troll
[ ] You said "me too" to something
[ ] You suck (literally)
[ ] Your sig/alias/server sucks
[ ] You posted a stupid pyramid money making scheme
[ ] I think you might be a fed
[ ] You posted in l33t 5p34k because you think that makes you cool
[ ] You didn't do anything specific, but appear to be so generally worthless that you are being flamed anyway

To Repent, You Must:

[ ] Give up your Internet access
[ ] Hang yourself
[ ] Tell your Mommy you've been a bad boy
[ ] Jump into a bathtub while holding your monitor
[ ] Actually post something relevant
[ ] Install a brain that actually works
[ ] Read the FAQ
[ ] Be the guest of honor in alt.flame for a month

In Closing, I'd Like to Say:

[ ] Blow me
[ ] Get a life
[ ] Never post again
[ ] Reach your 10th birthday
[ ] Age 5 more years before you post again
[ ] You couldn't do anything with a brain if you had one
[ ] Go to hell
[ ] Yer momma's so fat/stupid/ugly that etc...
[ ] Get ****ed, you pathetic loser
[ ] All of the above

==========End Flame==========

Cheers, Gary

[Wildeybeast]

All SM should be painted blue, because that how they are on the box. And all other armies should be painted exactly how they are show on the box, so the only proper Tyranids are white and purple and the only proper Tau are turd coloured.

[gwensdad]

You should only use GW paints on your minis because they are the best value and coverage.

Also, no miniature should ever use a "girly" color because as we KNOW, the meanings of colors never change over time.*

Beer-battered fish SUCKS**

Descent of Angels was a FANTASTIC book.

Using custom bases is cheating!



*in the early 1900s, pink was a "little BOYS" color because it was lightish-red, blue was for girls. In 40,000 years gray might be the "girly color" for all we know.
**Yes, don't be telling me otherwise. I HATE THAT

[Aldramelech]

Fish sucks full stop, battered or otherwise.

[Xenith]

First!

[HsojVvad]

White Dwarf Codicies, are the best.

[Drunkencorgimaster]

If the 40,00 Imperer ever fights Dark Vader, than Derk Vador wil totally rool the emperer's ***!

an not only that but the galactika could totally rule a battle berges' ***!

[WereWolf_nr]

Just remember that the Ultramarines head Astropath is a half eldar.*


*Old fluff, but I'm not joking

[gwensdad]

Just remember that the Ultramarines head Astropath is a half eldar.*


*Old fluff, but I'm not joking

And I can find that issue of White Dwarf and take a picture. Also, Calgar was close to retirement.

hmm...but need to troll....Oh yeah

His half-Eldar-ness means he's a better psycher than any human or xeno.

[Demonus]

This "Warhammer" game is just a WoW clone and will never last.

[condottiere]

Fishmen is the next Army Book on the GW schedule.

[DrLove42]

Space Marines are obviously just a rip off of Terrans in Starcraft.

[L192837465]

I vehemently disagree with your comment, not because you have a right to your opinion, but because you are flat-out wrong. Go back to your mothers basement and wait for her to bring you your hotpocket while doing some actual research. When I say something, it's correct, because I research my facts instead of blithely ranting about how your period blood doesn't actually paint on miniatures well. You give a bad name to players everywhere, and I hope you come to my city and learn how to really play the game. Hobby has no place in a game.

[the jeske]

If you were bio engineering female super soldiers why would you even give them breasts?

because you could after doing 3-4 generations of created ones just breed the new super soliders , unlike when you start with male ones. also with two XX chromosoms even with the sm modifications the damage to the gene seed and the abilty of the breed aspirants to accept it would be much higher then with male ones . Genetics wise it is always better to build a new breed or race/type on females not males .

[Morgan Darkstar]

space marines are the best army EVER!! nuff said. :D

[Drunkencorgimaster]

This "Warhammer" game is just a WoW clone and will never last.

Brilliant. The scary thing is that I bet a fair number of people think that.

[fade_74]

because you could after doing 3-4 generations of created ones just breed the new super soliders , unlike when you start with male ones. also with two XX chromosoms even with the sm modifications the damage to the gene seed and the abilty of the breed aspirants to accept it would be much higher then with male ones . Genetics wise it is always better to build a new breed or race/type on females not males .

Remember, we are supposed to be trolling. You should have said something like....."I know why they would leave fun bags on a female space marine, because the emperium could save a crapton on reductors. Put their progenoid gland in their boobs. When they die...just whip out ye olde pocket knife and bam. No special tools needed." Actually that is a terrible idea. I can't imagine what an apothecary would look like with 26 boobs hanging off his belt. We could get goatboy to do the artwork though, he is my very favorite artist.

[Hive Mind]

I'd just copy and paste Buffo's latest offering.

[Psychosplodge]

The "rules streamlining" has really improved the game,

finecast is excellent value for money,

They don't release new editions fast enough,

....

[Lockark]

The "rules streamlining" has really improved the game,

finecast is excellent value for money,

They don't release new editions fast enough,

....

Ha. I see what you did thier.

[Psychosplodge]

Ha. I see what you did thier.

What could you possibly be suggesting?:rolleyes:

[Sukz Da Nob]

Dear thread,

Please kill yourself.

Thanks.

[gwensdad]

Vampire counts armies totally rip off Twilight.
I should be allowed to post fantasy in 40K forums.
RT era minis are superior in every way to anything that came later.
WD Codexes are broken and beat up on "real" book codexes.
Some old 70's show stole Ogyrn from 40K! GW needs to sue.

[DarkLink]

because you could after doing 3-4 generations of created ones just breed the new super soliders , unlike when you start with male ones. also with two XX chromosoms even with the sm modifications the damage to the gene seed and the abilty of the breed aspirants to accept it would be much higher then with male ones . Genetics wise it is always better to build a new breed or race/type on females not males .

But how can pregnant Marines kill the enemies of the Imperium!? Blasphemy!

[Bedroom General]

This thread is a sign of none of you having a life.

[gwensdad]

This thread is a sign of none of you having a life.

you replied to it, what does that say of you?
Now if you don't mind, I have potions brewing in Pottermore and new Doctor Who to watch.

[Bedroom General]

My trollin' done got a bite, Damn I'm good!

[Drunkencorgimaster]

My trollin' done got a bite, Damn I'm good!

LOL!!! I wondered if that was what you were up to...

[Uncle Nutsy]

This thread is a sign of none of you having a life.

love you too, honey! mwah!

[TheRise]

Games Workshop has great quality products. And Playing Tau and Dark Eldar is like just the same, so shut up you stupid nerd.

[Melissia]

Just for the fun of it, what would be your best 40k trolling line?

"I was thinking of starting a female space marine army."

[Morgan Darkstar]

"I was thinking of starting a female space marine army."

And I was thinking of starting a male sisters army! :p

[Firebird]

What, GW is the best ever? The always try to make the simplest most streamlined rules they can!
They have Fantastic customer support! They have the best quality control on the new Finecast mini's too!
The models keep going down in price so much everyone wants to get into this hobby! Heck Mc'donalds is more expensive!
Man they update there codex's way way to fast, I mean 10+ years is waaaay to fast. I know lets make a new Army instead of updating current content!
And man people loved Fantasy before this last edition so lets make it even more fun!
Hey Lets keep all the codex's balanced, i mean come on who wouldn't want to play Deathwing over a Grey knight Termies list!

[Uncle Nutsy]

And I was thinking of starting a male sisters army! :p

that would be awesome!

[fuzzbuket]

The models keep going down in price so much everyone wants to get into this hobby! Heck Mc'donalds is more expensive!




mate you seen the price of those chicken burgers? i cna buy 5 guardians for a chicken burger and a pepsi (srsly no joke :P)

any ways back to trolololing:



space marine copied gears of war, and dawn of war copied halo wars.

FIREWARRIOR WAS THE BEST GAME EVAAAAA LETS RMEMEBER IT FOR ALL TIME !!!!!!!!!




i love friday by that black rebeka girl.

[Psychosplodge]

http://media.thinq.co.uk/photos/liara-figurine_1_big650.jpg

Hey look a female tau...

*image stolen from eldargirl post in the oubelittttte

[Build]

http://img37.imageshack.us/img37/4067/3b9a5829a710c624633c307.jpg



Does the artist have an aversion to noses or is he just forgetful?

[eldargal]

Damnit now I have to start a Tau army, thanks a lot. Ten years of avoiding those blue skinned sumb*tches down the drain.:rolleyes:


http://media.thinq.co.uk/photos/liara-figurine_1_big650.jpg

Hey look a female tau...

*image stolen from eldargirl post in the oubelittttte

[BaxterRicketts]

Well with all this talk about Tau, I have to say that they need to be nerfed! Every game I play, their fire warriors kick the crap out of my termagants in close combat!
Also, in my very RIGHT opinion, the pyrovore is the single greatest unit in the Tyranid book and anyone who disagrees is obviously inbred, retarded, and lame in one eye.

[Psychosplodge]

Damnit now I have to start a Tau army, thanks a lot. Ten years of avoiding those blue skinned sumb*tches down the drain.:rolleyes:

You're welcome

[Uncle Nutsy]

Damnit now I have to start a Tau army, thanks a lot. Ten years of avoiding those blue skinned sumb*tches down the drain.:rolleyes:

welcome to the light side. we have brownies.

[Psychosplodge]

*fixed*


welcome to communism. Enjoy our brownies or else....

[eldargal]

Not trolling: I just can't do it, I dislike the Tau aesthetic too much. The vehicles and crisis suits are ok but everything else, urgh.

Trolling: Tau smell like poo.

[JonnyRoxtar]

http://img37.imageshack.us/img37/4067/3b9a5829a710c624633c307.jpg



The biggest assumption everyone makes when seeing this picture is that its a female.

This is just the way all Dark Angels look.

[Necron2.0]

<image snipped>

Hey look a female tau...

*image stolen from eldargirl post in the oubelittttte

Ugh! That image looks all cutesy anime. I ABSOLUTELY HATE anime! It always reminds me of something a pre-teen girl would draw ... a girl with an unhealthy love of unicorns, kittens, cotton candy and the color pink.

But yes ... it does look very Tau.

[Psychosplodge]

Ugh! That image looks all cutesy anime. I ABSOLUTELY HATE anime! It always reminds me of something a pre-teen girl would draw ... a girl with an unhealthy love of unicorns, kittens, cotton candy and the color pink.

But yes ... it does look very Tau.



Urghh yuck, a girl.

[Necron2.0]

Urghh yuck, a girl.

Yeah, I don't like girls. I prefer women. ;)

Also, if I'm stuck looking at a unicorn, I prefer this:

http://members.cox.net/necron2.0/img/The_Unicorn.jpg

to this:

http://members.cox.net/necron2.0/img/RYTIFF.jpg

[Lockark]

http://www.terrariaonline.com/attachments/12760-glasses-macro-rainbow_dash-serious_business-png.9917/

[Necron2.0]

+1 Internets to Lockark.

[Chris Copeland]

Go Unicorns! Beat Canyon! Go Big Blue! U-Ni-Corns! U-Ni-Corns! U-ni-Corns! Woo-hoo! (That's right: my local school mascot is the Unicorn! Go Fighting Unicorns! ... if you don't believe it just google "New Braunfels, Texas"... as we say in New Braunfels, "Unicorn Pride is justified!" :P

[Duke]

Closed