Hilarious 40K Moments

[Unzuul the Lascivious]

So, this year have you had one of those moments in 40K that raise a chuckle or indeed and eyebrow? Has someone come up with a witty comment/name for one of the characters? Any tales of severe beatings? Had a base of Nurglings tear down a Space Marine Librarian like mine did? (Classic moment, the guy nearly packed up and left!). Tell us all about it!

[Drew da Destroya]

Team game, 2v2... Orks and Tyranid vs. Chaos Marines and Blood Angels, 2k points per side.

My opponent, the Chaos player, had a possessed land raider full of Kharne and pals (bersekers) cruising the battlefield, looking for a target. He's on the other side of a wooded hill, and on our side is a group of Tyranid Warriors, led by a Prime, and a mob of Flash Gitz with my KFF Mek. My Gitz are strung out, trying to take the charge... trying to save the troops-choice warriors (there was an objective nearby). It's the Chaos player's turn, and his Obliterators just showed up from reserves... and use Kharne's signal to drop down in ideal twin-flamer location.

Now, my opponent decides to Tank Shock, in order to bunch up the Gitz and Warriors for maximum burny-dancing. He'd then disembark Kharne and friends in order to slaughter the survivors. However, he misjudges the angle and distance of his tank shock, and winds up dead center between the warriors and the gitz... moving minimum distance causes us to do a full surround on the vehicle, trapping the Berserkers inside (and seriously pissing Kharne off). Flamers do minimal damage... Chaos player is annoyed, but knows he'll slaughter us next turn when he tank shocks out of the mess.

Our turn... I move in a group of nearby Kanz, getting into assault range on the tank. Other units don't move much more than is necessary to make a hole for the Kanz. The Prime detaches, and heads towards the Oblits... shooting from the warriors kill one oblit, and the gitz shoot at some uninvolved targets. The Kanz charge in, but need 6s to hit, and 4s to glance... no damage is done. The Prime wrecks the remaining oblit. The Chaos player grins, no doubt imagining the coming butchery.

In order to get his berserkers out of the Raider, he has to tank shock out... which allows my Kan one desperate Death or Glory attack. The Land Raider explodes, killing 4 bersekers, and seriously pissing off Kharne. However, Kharne trips on the crater, totally fails his difficult terrain, and fails to assault. Chaos player is totally crestfallen.

Our turn, we fire into the crater, killing the remaining berserkers. My Gitz charge in, take some damage, and tear Kharne limb from limb.

[eldargal]

A few months ago I was walking in the garden, thinking about Eldar and in particular, Warp Spiders. Walked into a spider web, forgot 40k isn't real. Thought it was monofilament wire and started squealing and waving my arms about in the full expectation of being sliced up. My brothers thought this was hilarious.:o

[Bigthunda]

My buddy and I were at our FLGS, and I was playing an Ork player. He had a death skullz army, and they were pretty poorly painted...blue armor with white paint sloppily painted on all their faces. Needless to say my buddy and I found this hilarious and called the guy out on it, to the effect of "Oh what's that all over their faces huh?" and he answered, "Don't worry guys, it's just warpaint." That's what she said.

[Lockark]

Last night I had to make 4 armour saves on my last Dark Eldar Warrioir in a squad.(Two pain tokens on them so far.)

I rolled three 6's meaning I passed 3/4 of the saves on my armour. I just had to roll on FNP save and I would of tied combat.

I rolled a 1.

O____O

[Archon Charybdis]

The other night I was playing Planetstrike with my buddies, and it was DE and Orks vs. IG and Grey Knights. The IG and Grey Knights were attacking, and the GK player was having terrible luck with his reserves rolls on turn 1. Despite reserves on turn 1 being on a 3+, he managed to only get in 2 squads of PAGKs and a Dreadnought--leaving his GM, two squads of termies, and his purgation squad all in reserves still.

So he deep struck the two squads of PAGKs behind a trio of Killa Kans in a squadron. Unfortunately, he scattered just enough to be out of assault range. Despondent at his luck, he says "Well they're back armor 10 right? I'll try to glance them with my stormbolters." He managed to glance twice, and immobilize both, wrecking them due to the squadron rules. Unfortunately, still not a great points trade off, but still an awesome sight after his run of bad luck :D

[Lerra]

I was playing Deathwing vs. Tau. Four Deathwing terminators charged 6 Fire Warriors. The terminators wiffed, and the fire warriors managed to kill one terminator. I lost combat, and another terminator died to a failed fearless save. Next round the Tau counter-charged with his HQ battlesuit and killed the rest of the terminators.

The next game, the mission was to hold the three objectives in the middle of the table. I had 20 terminators deep strike on the objective and spend the rest of the game huddled in cover, going to ground every round. I also had two DA apothecaries - the old, brokenly awesome ones. The Tau player shot at me for 6 turns, and by the end, I had exactly three terminators left - one on each objective. One of those terminators passed 14 out of 15 cover saves on that last turn, and I used the apothecary to ignore the last failed save. The Tau player almost ragequit. I've never seen a game since where the winning player did nothing the whole game except go to ground.

I told him he should have assaulted me.

[Xas]

I had a game with my DE against CE two weeks ago.

It was an epic struggle involving kharandras duelling urien rakart for most of the game (clonefield and regrowth VS 2+sv and eternal warrior) as well as many other struggles (like a raider and a lance-serpent immobilizing each other at point-blank range in broadside formation and then trying for many turns to kille ach other).


The one hilarious moment was when a Falcon decides to ram one of my kabalite raiders. Due to immense speed (we play with star engines work in the movement phase like aether sails ) we both suffered a s10 hit.

My Flickerfields gloriously deflected the impact with a 6. To make it quick: this was the first of a total of 4 6s that were rolled in a row from me (another 6 to penetrate and then double 6 for holofields to explode).


I could well imagine the face on the raiders captain, calmly hovering his hand above the power fields trigger, looking incoming doom into they eyes. Then with an arrogant smile pushing the trigger milliseconds before the much more massive eldar vehicle would smash into the fully charged power fields and violently exploding with only the frail looking layer of green shimmer between the crew and the super hot air.

[Unzuul the Lascivious]

Nice...:D

[MaltonNecromancer]

So ten enemy Genestealers enter heavy flamer range of my Dreadnought. Nine die. I giggle. My opponent figures "Frak it!", and charges my Dreadnought with his last remaining genestealer.

No problem.

He goes first, gets one hit.

No problem.

Rolls a 6 for armour penetration; it Rends. He rolls again.

He gets another 6. So it goes through the armour.

No problem.

He rolls for for damage.

...

Another 6.

My Dreadnought explodes. The Genestealer emerges unscathed.

Genestealer eats barbequed SM while my jaw hits the floor. The battle continued, and I won in the end, but none of us talk about my victory; not even me. Good story trumps a win every time.

[imperialsavant]

:D One Classic 40K moment I have never forgotten was in a game with my mate Glenn with his Orks Vs my Black Templars.
Well Glen had scratch built this huge Ork truck that could actually carry 20 Ork Boys &l this was its first game. He had it on the far left flank of his deployment Zone waiting to rush forward.
I had gotten the first turn & I fired at it with a Las Cannon armed Templar on a hill with clear line of sight. It hit, I rolled & penetrated. Rolled a 6 , Exploded & he lost 75% of the squad from bad saves.
You should have seen his face! :eek:

We still laugh about it now & he sees the funny side. He is always great fun to play against!

[Duke]

Probably one of the best moments is when a friend charged kharn and a unit of bezerkers into my blood angels, he killed everyone in my squad except one guy. He was all excited that kharn was going to be stuck in combat which hebwould easily win during my turn and then be free to wreck havoc among my lines in his turn.

Then I shot a vindicator at his rhino which scattered wildly and landed on kharn and my guy. Kharn lived but my guy died, I then opened up on kharn with everything I had, sealing the game in my favor... Sometimes scatter is your friend.

Duke

[sorienor]

A game I was watching:

A buzzsaw-equiped deffkopta assaults a rhino with 5 bog standard CSM in it. Stuns it.

next turn the CSM get out, shoot and assault the deffkopta. bad rolling and good saves gives only 1 wound on the kopter, the PK kills 2 csm but they hold.

Kopta makes it's hit and run roll!

Next turn kopta re-assaults the rhino, blowing it up. The resulting explosion kills the kopta, kills 1 CSM forcing a leadership which they promptly fail and fall off the table.

Entire corner cleared out in one phase.

My Orks vs CSM.

3 terminators are in combat with a unit of 'ard boys (worst case scenario for me)

Nearby is a vindicator and another unit of boys.

Vindicator fires, scatters, hitting ONLY his terminators. All invul saves fail.

Next turn regular boys assault and kill vindicator.

That was the turning point in the game.

[davel]

I once had a game against orks against my mate alex in the bag, but got greedy.

using my scoring unit of jet bikes to shoot a truck it disappeared in a huge mushroom taking my jet-bikes with it.

to this day that truck sports a trophy glyph with my 3 jetbikes on it.

dave l

[Orannis]

My psyker battle squad have killed more with their las-pistols and staves then with pychic powers. Its a running joke now in my local store.

The first time it happened I was fighting Orks. The army was heavy on boyz, and my psykers got out of their chimera behind a large mob trapping them between themselves and the chimera, then they cast weaken resolve to reduce their LD. After my shooting phase the Orks failed their morale test and fell back, and with no where to go were wiped out. The squad was then charged by the mega armoured warboss (last survivor after his nob squad was hit by a manticore) and managed to beat him down before he struck with his powerfist (he only had two wounds left). Despite their low weapon skill and strength. I then proceded to fail every other psycic test for them for two turns, so spent the last two turns stuck in the ruins of a building in a shoot out with grots.

Another battle and Im fighting against Tyranids. My psyker battle squad have been wittled down to two psykers and the overseer, but are still fighting the hordes amassed before them. I decide to unleash a str 2 soul storm on a termagant brood but fail my psycic test. The overseer excercutes D3 psykers before the perils of the warp overtake them, I roll a three, so he whips out his pistol while their minds are channeling eldritch energies and blams them both between the eyes. He then looks at the horde of 'gaunts closing in and decides its all to much and blams himself too.

[Yriel_The_Angelic]

So i was playing Death Guard against my friends vanilla marines. I was winning kill points by 2 and he only had one squad left with one plasma gun in it, it's turn 5 and he goes last. He fires the plasma gun at the rhino. It explodes, with 6 inch range. I lost one ENTIRE UNIT of Plague marines (squad of 7 at the time) in that little blast and my havocs lose half the squad, did a leadership FAILED and fled off the board. We rolled for turn 6 but rolled a one......Worst day of my life lol

[Grailkeeper]

I once convinced my girlfriend to play a game of strip 40k*






















*this may be a lie

[Daemonette666]

I was playing an Apocalypse game at my local GW store last year. Stompas and Baneblades had been destroyed, and the gamers hopes were dashed because only 1 super heavy actually blew up, and that was a small explosion. The rest had been just wrecked.

My Zarakynel Greater Daemon Lord of Slaanesh (Gargantuan Creature) had been causing a great deal of damage to the ork boyz, when Zogrot wanders over and puts a curse on my Daemon Lord. I rolled a 6 and the now poor unfortunate Squig, which the Ork player just happened to have on him runs or in this case hobbles over to the nearest rhino to hide out the game.

I am reminded of this every time the Ork player sees me, and he asks for a rematch.

[PRoeske]

About a week ago, I had one of the most insane first turns ever. This time is was in my favour, but we both had a good laugh about it and started the game over.

Playing 1700pts Imperial Guard vs Eldar (Mech, Walker-spam). In ths very first turn, I was able to nuke about 1300 pts of Eldar, leaving only a Wave Serpent, some firedragons and a unit of harlequins (which were held in reserves).

Just insane.

[Unzuul the Lascivious]

Huge 12K per side game on Saturday, with an alliance of Choas marines, Orks, Dark Eldar and my daemons taking on the might of the Imperium, Astartes and Tau. It went very badly for the forces of evil, but not for my daemons. Whilst the forces of the Orks and Dark Eldar crumpled, and the Chaos marines faltered, my daemons, led by Scabieathrax, had a great time! There was no way of winning the day, so I set out on a personal mini objective - kill Sicarius. After 3 rounds of combat in which Sicarius and his champion withstood the crushing hammerblows of Scabiathrax, Fateweaver finally turned him into a gibbering warp spawn, much to the horror of the onlooking Tau (who were all cowering at the back like the Smurfs they are!)

Same match, the Changeling forces a Hellhound to roast the Imperial players own men. Sweet...

[Lerra]

We play a 40k drinking game now and then. It's a big free-for-all with as many people as we have. Everyone puts as much stuff on the table as they want.

Every time you lose a kill point, you take a shot. Don't put more units on the table than you can handle!

Every game, someone will put 11 KPs on the table, and of course we all gang up on that person to get them trashed. By turn 3 they are hiding their last fragments of units and praying that they roll well on their cover saves.

[Mystery.Shadow]

We play a 40k drinking game now and then. ...Every time you lose a kill point, you take a shot

Guess nobody plays Tyranids or Orks then!

We've played a 40k Drinking game. Once the table is set up and the Armies deployed, every time you finish a beer, you may place the can/bottle on the table. It counts as Impassable Terrain which cannot be destroyed.

The only limit, is your limit!

[Xas]

On saturday I've had another hilarious situation. My grotesquen led by a haemoncoli are rocking house in a chaos space marine rhino fortress and everything is going well. then a chaos general steps in and *****slaps the haemoncoli with his slanesh deamon weapon. Without any further hussle the grotesquen roll a 1 for their psycho-check and go mental (2d6 s5 hits to every unit within 2d6 ").
3 rhinos, 10 lesser deamons, 8 chaos space marines and a chaos lord were killed in the ensuing chaos of grotesquen bashing around and rhinos exploding.

I just said "now you know, why every damned soul in comouragh knows to leave the haemoncoli alone" :D



I was playing an Apocalypse game at my local GW store last year. Stompas and Baneblades had been destroyed, and the gamers hopes were dashed because only 1 super heavy actually blew up, and that was a small explosion. The rest had been just wrecked.

My Zarakynel Greater Daemon Lord of Slaanesh (Gargantuan Creature) had been causing a great deal of damage to the ork boyz, when Zogrot wanders over and puts a curse on my Daemon Lord. I rolled a 6 and the now poor unfortunate Squig, which the Ork player just happened to have on him runs or in this case hobbles over to the nearest rhino to hide out the game.

I am reminded of this every time the Ork player sees me, and he asks for a rematch.

gargantuan creatures are immune to all psychic powers which do not posses a strenght value.
that and Zara isnt even an IC so (s)he isnt beeing able to be targeted in the first place...

[davel]

Guess nobody plays Tyranids or Orks then!

We've played a 40k Drinking game. Once the table is set up and the Armies deployed, every time you finish a beer, you may place the can/bottle on the table. It counts as Impassable Terrain which cannot be destroyed.

The only limit, is your limit!

another variation you and your opponent draw up an army list that your opponent must use.
the potential to stuff each other up is just too funny.

to date the funniest game like this I've heard about was a warhammer fantasy with a ( last army book) skaven army where entire character allowance was spent on warlock engineer with all the warp lighting boosting war gear apart from the wargear item that gave them warp lightening.

dave l

[darkeldardenny]

Played in an Apoc game on Sunday. Friend of mine was running Chaos Wolves(Chaos and Space Wolves) In one turn his two units of Khorne Beserkers, Kharne, an wolf priest, and Logan Grimnar(kharne and grimnar were attached to a squad each, wolf priest with kharne) charged a Valkyrie, rhino with scouts inside, two bike squad of attack bikes, and a venerable dreadnaught. Three beserkers did a cheerleading basket toss(two tossers, one flyer) and knock it out of the sky, rhino with scouts is surrounded and wrecked, opponent tries to emergency disembark but cant fit any outside an inch of the beserkers and they die, Kharne hits dreadnaught all 7 times, penetrates 6, and after rerolls(venerable dread), Kharne has ripped the dread in half and logan never got his chance. As for the attack bikes, I don't remember what happened to them, though I don't think they lived.

Same game, my flickerfields flickered better than ever. In one turn I took atleast 15-20 flickerfield saves and failed 2. Also after blowing off the main gun to a bane blade, my teammate's fire prism linked and focus fired, the bane blade had two structure points left. We were confident that the fire prism would take off one structure point and my final bike that was fleeing but within melta range on the bane blade would finish it off hopefully. The fire prism shot had precision aim and the shot flew into the smoking remains of the bane blades main barrel, got two chain reaction results in a row and then an apocalyptic explosion of 11 inches. Not only did my bike die, but also whole squads of genestealers, honor guards, and a few leman russes were incinerated. We now know who fires the weapon systems of that fire prism, "Rebel Base Intercom Voice: "His computer's off. Luke, you switched off your targeting computer. What's wrong?" Luke: "Nothing. I'm all right."

[eldargal]

Had an Ork player tell me I was crazy to field Howling Banshees against him. My Banshees and Farseer proceed to slaughter his warboss and meganob bodyguard in one round of combat without any casualties. I thought that was rather hilarious.

Wrote a story (http://www.lounge.belloflostsouls.net/blog.php?b=78) about it to immortalise the moment.

[DrLove42]

Had a full unit of Vanguard deep strike straight into assault with 2 broadsides and their 4 shield drones. Figured i was pretty screwed.

That combat went on for 3 whole turns, with me winning combat 5 of those times, drawing only once...lost a single drone through the entire thing and killed the entire enemy unit. The broadsides, despite 4 S5 attacks a turn only killed one. The drones headbutted the rest to death with their one attack. Hit and wounded with nearly all of them.

That squad now goes into battle under the monika "Frisbees of Death"

[Weafwolf]

I've got three, all against the same guy:

1. My friend had a unit of Celestians with a Cannoness and Vulkan in a LR. I blew up the LR with a Landspeeder MM. Seven Celestians were wounded and failed their armor saves. I killed the rest rapid firing with a unit of GH. Next, a missile from Longfangs got through Spirit of the Martyr and instakilled the Cannononess. In the end, he had Vulkan left with one wound after what amounted to very little shooting.

2. That same game, I unloaded Arjac in the backfield. He had Telion, who hit twice and allocated to Arjac. He then rolled two 6s to rend, and Arjac failed both storm shield saves. Payback's a *****.

3. My favorite was in a three way game based on a mission we found online. Three commanders (with retinues) meet in the middle when something goes wrong with the parley and battle breaks out. I had the Deceiver. One friend had Abaddon and a unit of termies. The guy from the above story had Celestine and some Seraphim. Looks like a severe mismatch for the girls. Deceiver and Abaddon go toe-to-toe. Deceiver kills some termies and blows up, killing the rest. Celestine charges in alone and uses the initiative bonus power to go first. She does three wounds and kills Abaddon. Friend starts yelling, "I'm not a *****! I'm not a *****!" I'm in tears laughing...

[Coffeemugg]

One of my friends played Necrons every week and won constantly.

You know the saying "What Goes Around Comes Around"? Well it came around

He deployed his force pretty close together and was using the Night Bringer. His opponent had first turn and put every weapon he could into the Night Bringer. Night Bringer Explodes 6'' Hitting every unit in the Necron Aarmy.

My friend fails every cover save he can Take. On His turn 1 he checks for phase out and disappears off the table.

Game over on the Top of turn 1.

Totally hilarious!!!!

[Darkwynn]

I was playing Aventine in a tournament and we were both at the top table for the last game.I was playing Foot Black templar and he was playing Eldar.

Aventine wins the roll to go first and moves his army around but he only has one shot on me with his wraithlord to my venerable dreadnought. He takes it and Pens. he rolls a 6 and I ask him to reroll and he gets another 6.

I thought that was annoying but he rolls the explosion results and gets another 6 and hits Three squads with the blast. One had my marshell and another had my emperors champion. I lost a model in each squad and rolled leadership checks for each squad on ld 10. I failed three test and ran off the table because it was the first turn and I didn't even get a chance to go yet.

I just shaked Aventine hand and went its all yours. His one wraithlord kill a over 1000 points with one shot. I was dumbfounded that whole game.

[Acharnement]

My Daemons lost to the Eldar in a 1000 point game last night. Blundering on my part and careful play by Eric lead to Eldar victory. Despite the loss, the highlight for me was a single Plaguebearer.
The 6 Plaguebearers dropped in between a building full of Dark Reapers and a squad of Jetbikes. They advanced and got hammered by ranged fire, leaving only 1 standing. The 3 Jetbikes roar in to finish him off. They do no wounds, and lose one of theirs to the Plaguebearer's 1 attack. They fail their leadership and flee off the board. The Plaguebearer consolidates-yes, one model consolidates, next to the building full of Dark Reapers. Next turn, he charges in. The Dark Reapers, including the Exarch do.... no wounds. The Plaguebearer kills off one Dark Reaper. The Exarch fails his Leadership roll and they begin to flee toward their table edge. Unfortunately, the Plaguebearer move to within 6" so they cannot rally. In their next turn, they flee off the board edge. Well over 200 points lost because of 1 Plaguebearer. Kudos to my worthy opponent, Eric, for keeping his cool through this.:)

[shrike]

My 5-man scout squad has killed, last year:
daemon prince
monolith
20 necron warriors
chaplain
chapter master
3 vindicators
predator
2 leman russes
tactical squad (10)
2 land speeders
creed
kell
guard company command

all in combat. That's just what I can remember off the top of my head. And it's only the sergeant, Caddius, who seems to do anything. Meltabombs and combat knives go along way when underestimated. And Caddius only does something of interest when all his squad are dead.
:D

[Valkerie]

One of mine is with my IG company command squad. In one battle, I had the Astropath. According to the fluff, Astropaths are blind, so, just for gits and shiggles, I was rolling seperate dice for him to shoot and wound. My opponent charged my unit with a Necron squad. They failed their rough terrain roll, and had to take a turn of shooting. Only the Astropath managed to hit and wound with his laspistol, and the Necron failed his armor save, followed by failing his WWB roll.

The next turn, the Necron Lord assaults my squad. Again, I'm rolling seperately for the Astropath. He's the only one who hits and wounds, and the Necron Lord fails his armor saves against this attack.

Over the next couple of games, this blind guy kicked a$$ and took names., showing the rest of the squad how to do it. Just goes to show, never underestimate the handicapped.:)

[eldargal]

One of our group, known as "nid lady', was playing a game against her sons Blood Angels. She says:
"Right, my Carnifex brood their are going to ejac-ulate their bio plasma onto your Death Company"
Her son "Don't use that word!"
"What, Death Company"
"No, the other one!"
"Carnifex?"
"Ejac-ulate!"
"Oh, why not?"
"Its freaking me out!"
"Well, you just need to ejac-ulate more"
"JESUS CHRIST MOTHER!

Poor boy was so flustered he lost the game convincingly. I was laughing so hard I nearly stabbed myself in the face with a Wych.

[Laodamia]

LOL
I like this one!

[Rissan4ever]

One of our group, known as "nid lady', was playing a game against her sons Blood Angels. She says:
"Right, my Carnifex brood their are going to ejac-ulate their bio plasma onto your Death Company"
Her son "Don't use that word!"
"What, Death Company"
"No, the other one!"
"Carnifex?"
"Ejac-ulate!"
"Oh, why not?"
"Its freaking me out!"
"Well, you just need to ejac-ulate more"
"JESUS CHRIST MOTHER!

Poor boy was so flustered he lost the game convincingly. I was laughing so hard I nearly stabbed myself in the face with a Wych.

I just think it's awesome that his mom plays 40K. I wish my mom played 40K, or my wife. I'd get a lot more games in. More dirty jokes, too.:)

[Defenestratus]

I had my Sanguinius model deepstrike mishap and die when he scattered onto a gretchin.

[shrike]

"I shall kill your warboss with my sanguinor."
"Well- I have my grots to help!"
"pfft. what are they gonna do, fling faeces and scream?"
"You'll be suprised."
*scatters*
"Well, it's pretty unlikely that-"
*destroyed*
"Told you..."
"F***ing grots, mishapping my stupid f***ing sanguinor- how the f*** could such a sh** unit manage to kill the f***ing sanguinor?! He'd just land on them and crush thier tiny little f***ing heads and kill that f***ing warboss and win me the f***ing game!!!!"
"No need to swear."
*silent fume and glowers*
:D

[doom-kitten]

Playing Death Guard, my seraphim plus celestine deepstrike, pass divine guidance and promptly immolate terminator lord and retinue. His turn a vindicator rolls up, fires, I fail invul test unit goes splat and celestine fails divine intervention. She rolls a 6 and empties my faith pool, my next turn exorcist fires and misses 6 times. Vindicator murders the exorcist, immolator follows shortly after...

[Morgan Darkstar]

this is posted elswhere by me so i have cut and pasted to save time

"Definitely the greatest of my fluke wins was when my last unit on the board a weaponless rhino tankshocked abbadon and the full unit of un touched chaos terminators he was with they then failed two leadership rolls and ran of the table 10" winning me the game lol":)

unsuprisingly my opponent was none to pleased especially after someone pointed out the fact that a fearless IC looses it if he joins a non-fearless squad. "well abaddons ld10 not likely i will fail that" famous last words :)

[Aegis]

Back in September, I took part in a 80,000 point Apocalypse game (the 10 part video battle report can be seen at http://www.miniwargaming.com/home4.)

During this battle, two events really stood out. The first was when a Warlord Titan was brought down by a single (single!) traitor guardsman with a meltagun. The dice gods were definitely on the side of chaos in that instance.

The other event was when a Daemon Prince was brought down by a Tau drone... We suspect it had something to do with indigestion.

My personal favorite moment, though not terribly funny, was when I remembered I had a demolisher cannon on my Baneblade (turn 4, by the way), fired it once at a Skull loota, had it scatter into a stompa, cause the stompa to go apocalyptic, hit the aforementioned tank, which then went apocalyptic itself, and wiped out a ton of my Sisters (save a long sister and a Canoness).

[Sinistermind]

i was playin my nids vs blood angels, very brutal game, 1 objective in each deployment zone,
he was going for the win as i didnt have enough force to take his, i had 5 gaunts and an hq exhausted tervigon on my objective, he runs his 3 remaining TH/SS termies towards my objective on the top of turn 6...barely makes it within 3" to contest, everyone goes gg (which it was!!!), until i decide to shoot my 5 gaunts at his termies, YUP

4 hits, 4 wounds
1 four and 3 ones

bye bye storm shields...and his win

[Unzuul the Lascivious]

Dark Eldar Vs Space Wolves, my surviving Helliarch adds his attacks to a unit of Wyches against Njal Stormcaller and his Grey Hunter unit. The Wyches wipe the Hunters out, leaving Njal facing them alone. Turns out his Cyber Raven has a better Initiative than him, and it proceeds to kill the Helliarch! We giggle as we recount visions of a Raven repeatedly pecking the Helliarch in the temples until he finally decide just to fly down the screaming Eldar's throat...

[snikrot]

last year it was CSM VS SM i was chaos there was a group of 5 scouts holding an objective in the middle of the board i charge them with 10 khorn terminators, after about a million ones later there was 5 scouts left and no terminators to be seen. Ithen proceeded to throw away those dice and immedietl by a new set from the store we were in .

[Nod]

In one of the first games I watched, a lone tactical marine with a missile launcher took the last wound off a daemon prince. In assault.

[Deadlift]

1st game I used Typhus, he killed 9 terminators and understandably I suddenly became rather fond of my nurgly HQ. The following game expecting to see this happen again I was gobsmacked when I rolled nothing but 1s in combat and Typhus proceeded to kill himself. :eek:

[bloodangel 83]

I have a couple of stories with my BA. against Black Templars' don't remember pt value of game
1st- Attack bike w/ MM 50pts vs. LRC 250 pts and 10 man Termies 1 special character, attack bike moves 12" and fires MM, hits, pens and explosives LRC killing 8 Termies and SC. Opponnet saves the 2 Termies and shoots ab killing both riders. "That is why i hate a 50 pt attack bike w/ MM" states Black Templar player.
2nd BA vs NIDS - 5 man BA Termies servive 57 shoots from 2 20 man squad with no damage to Termies for 3 rounds of shooting(ea rd is 57 shoots), turn 4 1 termie fail a single save from another 50+ shots. Nid player states there is no way in H3!! that Termies are suppost to take that many rds and live.
3rd BA vs SM - BA Capt by him self fires into a 10 man sniper scout squad killing two, Capt dies when snipers return fire, BA LRC w/ Hurriance Bolter opens up on sniper squad killing the rest of the scouts before 5 man termies could assualt scouts. I lost due to him having to leave and BA army having little in the way of pts to codent objective. Thanks for starting this post. Charlie

[Hellstorm]

my worst game every was the first time i played my tau vs Imperial guard. he got first turn rolled his hellhound up and was able to fit all 9 fire warriors and my etherial under the template and remover the whole squad. i then proceed to take leadership test across the board and all that remained was a hammerhead. over 1300 pts in one shot!

[Wolf Brother Hellstrom]

One of the best games i ever had was a couple of years ago i was playying my buddy Chaos Demons vs Grey Knights MeatGrinder mission so the demons had to table my Grey Knights. Despite all the advantages of Grey knights due to bad rolling he was crushing me. we made to the last turn and i only had 3 termies left on the table and he unleased everything he had on me. I made like 14 out of 15 saves and won the game with a single model!! He was so pissed he punched a hole in the wall and broke his hand! i couldnt stop laughing even when we were in the hospital. another funny side note is that i sold my army to him and he has yet to win against me with it.

[eldargal]

Sorry about the threadomancy, but overheard this conversation at my games club last night and it belongs here:


Boy 1: I'll have my Valkyrie painted this time next week.
Bo 2: No you won't.
Boy 1: I will!
Boy 2: You've been saying it for months.
Boy1: I mean it this time, I'll paint it!
Boy 2: No you won't.
Boy 1: SHUT UP! I'LL PAINT IT, I'LL PAINT THE SH*T OUT OF THAT MOTHER F*CKER!
Boy 2: Ha!

The moral of the story: boys are odd.

[Kushial]

my favorite one has to be from a game I watched two friends playing. They're playing 1500pts Crimson Fists vs Imperial Guard. On the last turn, Pedro Kantor, who had been with a Sternguard squad, ran up onto an objective to contest it which put the Fists ahead on the game. It was then that a lone Imperial Guard sergeant with a power fist runs out and charges Pedro. Pedro wiffs all his attacks and is felled by the Sgt who is now forever more known as Brave Staff Sgt Suckerpunch.

[BrokenWing]

This was a few editions ago but it was a team game. Two Avatars (one on each side) charge each other and.....nothing. No hits, no wounds.

Back in 3rd edition was playing my Nids vs my friends Orks. After 6 turns we were down to a single biovore running away from a single Ork.

Another game when I played IG. Tyranids bearing down on us (team game again) so I start blasting away at a big scary Hive Tyrant that would have wiped out an entire flank because of our lack of close combat over there. I take out his tyrant guard, I get him down to two wounds. So I shoot him with my Vindicare's Turbo Penetrator round...and miss.

I fire a ML into him. He takes a wound.

Now down to a single lone guardsmen with a single las gun. Shoots. hits. Wounds. Fails 2+ save, dead. I painted his laspistol gold and he is now "The man with the golden gun" and got promoted to sergeant. Still have the model along with my female commisar.

More recently:

My friend is playing in 4th edition, has his full sized Grey Knight Terminator Squad, plus Grand Master. They get shot, take 13 wounds. He rolls 13 ones. Everything dies.

Team tournament (5th edition). A Trygon charges my less than 5 man Dark Eldar warrior squad with one wound left...and dies to the Agonizer.

Today: My friend (same guy with the 13 ones) has a 10 man dev squad with 4 MLs. I shoot them with some Grey Knights, he takes 10 wounds. 4 Missile Launchers...and a sergeant, die.

[Occam]

Last apocalypse game I played against this Ork and Tau player, Zack. Lots of funny moments resulted from the hilarity of the deep strike role on turn one!

I play Necrons, reserved everything except for my Pylon and a group of ten warriors. I used the Shroudweaver war cell [on GW website] and the Monolith phalanx, again, on turn one. There is one section of the board relatively free of terrain, and then one quarter of the board was FILLED with urban terrain. I land a monolith there, and it drifts slightly. No big deal. Then the other two each land on top of the other one, which forces the other monoliths to move out of the way....

I ended up creating a conga line of monoliths. We laughed a good while at the sheer dumb luck of that one.

BUT WAIT, there's more! So after my Necrons teleport out and vaporize a 30 man boyz squad to 11, it turns out that I've completely blocked out his line of sight. No Tau could shoot, the boyz were no where close. My Pylon had blown up the truck with Ghazkull in it and he spends the next 3 turns/hours hoofing it over to my monoliths, and still only manages to blow up one on turn 5, after two or three full rounds of close combat.

And I have proof!


Oh, and that one he destroyed

[Occam]

only one was lost that whole game.--the one ghazzkull tore apart. It took several hammerhead and rail rifles and 4 or 5 turns to do it, and at one point, the monolith just told him to deal with it.

[Lockark]

Team tournament (5th edition). A Trygon charges my less than 5 man Dark Eldar warrior squad with one wound left...and dies to the Agonizer.


Down Simba! *Whip Crack*

[talos]

Me Necrons against IG in a tournament. 1st Turn 1st shot. 1 lascannon from a heavy weapons team shoots my monolith. 6 to hit, 6 to penetrate, 6 to damage! :eek:

Another occasion I multicharged my banshees against some BA assault marines and 2 honor guard that survived some heavy shooting due to crazy cover saves. Both units were doomed. Did some wounds on the marines and wiped them but none on the 2 honor guard which were my prime target due to the 2+ save. I won combat by 2 and by opponents rolls snake eyes on his fearless saves! :D

[egorene]

Yesterday a Demon Prince charged a terminator Squad , he had Warptime , and scored didnt wound
a terminator .

Some time ago , my Blood Angel Assault Terminators charged with a Sang. Priest , and hit
nothing .

Vulkan died because of 3 hits with a heavy bolter .

[RealGenius]

Thunderwolf Lord charges squad of 8 Guardmen after their Chimera blows up. He suffers three wounds before getting to swing his Thunderhammer and fails all three 2+ Runic Armor saves.

In an Apocalypse game, Ghazghkull and his Trukk full of Nobs drive toward the objective on the last turn, recklessly careening through a minefield, which destroys the Trukk and causes a Kareeen! results which delivers them safely across the minefield and close enough to assault the Guard squad on the objective.

After that, their luck turned and they were mowed down in assault by Straken and a GK Grand Master.

[LemanRussCommander]

Only hilarious because the cops weren't called...

My buddy and i were in the midst of a brutal rivalry game of Dark Eldar vs Khorne (Blood)Angels. Every time he dark lanced my DC dreadnought and he rolled a 1 or 2 i kept shouting "None shall stay my wrath!" after six turns of this my neighbors (i live in a townhouse) came over concerned because they thought me and the misses were going at it. Meanwhile she's downstairs shaking her head at her husband and"his toys"

[Grenadier]

In a previous battle I had cobbled together a new vanilla list using my Black Templars to represent the new list. I was particularly fond of Ko'sorro Khan's stats and rules and so utilized a Black Templars turned vanilla version of him. He was mounted on his bike and ready to go to war.

On foot, beside him, was the Emperor's Champion.

My opponent brought his Dark Angels and all their special characters. And so I sent my Templar-Khan up a road on his bike with my Emperor's Champion running along side on foot. I made good rolls for running and didn't move my bike mounted captain his full distance to ensure both characters would be keeping up with each other.

They first wiped out a Command Squad and Chapter Master together. And then Templar Khan split off to the left to handle some Terminators. But then he needed a wee bit of help so in the next turn the Emperor's Champ trotted over to lend a hand.

This same move was repeated again to deal with a Tactical Squad.

To me and my opponent this odd duo were quite comical. I just pictured a crazed Templar Khan charging at anyone in righteous fury with an exasperate, out of breath, and exhausted Emperor's Champion tagging along as best as he could. Shouting with an arm raised "Hey! Wait for me will ya! I don't have a bike you know!"

[nosferatu]

hmmmmm....best moment....

apoc' game. on one side; nids, deldar, chaos and necrons.the other was me using orks, mech IG, smurfs and bangels.

i was deployed on the flank with big units of boyz and several looted boom wagons and next to me was the IG mech army, all brand spanking new models, just painted one hour before the game. we were winning the game, lots of nids died and a fair amount of their tanks had gone. then a trygon game infront of the IG baneblade. we all started to panic. it was our shooting phase, on of my looted wagons turned its boom gun, took aim and the great beast and fired...the scatter dice tumbled across the table, my teams' hearts were pounding, then they stopped....and so did the IG players...it had scattered directly over the baneblade....penertrated.....BIG BOOM. it didnt end there....he was in a tank line formation...so with one friendly fire shot....more than three quarters of the IG tanks were rubble. oh and the trygon didnt take any damage at all and we lost the game.

after this i quickly ran out of the shop to attempt to out run my blood thirsty team :P

[BrotherAlpharius]

A few months ago I was walking in the garden, thinking about Eldar and in particular, Warp Spiders. Walked into a spider web, forgot 40k isn't real. Thought it was monofilament wire and started squealing and waving my arms about in the full expectation of being sliced up. My brothers thought this was hilarious.:o

This combined with a recent post of yours about 40k dreams makes me think that you have an even more tenuous grasp on reality than the average gamer.

[eldargal]

Sometimes, yes, I call them 'blonde moments'.

[scadugenga]

hmmmmm....best moment....

apoc' game. on one side; nids, deldar, chaos and necrons.the other was me using orks, mech IG, smurfs and bangels.

Wait, you were using tiny blue guys with funny hats and a girl band from the 80's on your side?

Did they walk like Eqyptians?

;)

[Mystery.Shadow]

Wait, you were using tiny blue guys with funny hats and a girl band from the 80's on your side?

Did they walk like Eqyptians?

Now Sacadugenga's comment was a Hilarious 40k Moment in itself!

[Luke Licens]

Now Sacadugenga's comment was a Hilarious 40k Moment in itself!


Wait, you were using tiny blue guys with funny hats and a girl band from the 80's on your side?

Did they walk like Eqyptians?

;)

My first thought was 'But the Thousand Sons are on the other side!'

[Unzuul the Lascivious]

Two of my Grey Knight Paladins (with one wound left each) bum-rushed the byatch of a Vindicare that had been blowing my Stormravens out of the sky - and the utter slag polished them both off before they could land a blow. Let it not be said they're only good for shooting...actually, I'm still really p*ssed about that...

[eldargal]

In an Apocaylpse battle last night, my Lelith Hesperax (I only take SCS in apocalypse battles) was hit 16 times by a Punisher gatling cannon. Wounded 16 times, saved every single one with her 4+ dodge. That was hilarious, for me. Not so much for my brother. She then proceeded, over the following three turns, to kill around 2000pts of stuff and survived the game without losing a wound.

[Unzuul the Lascivious]

God, I miss Hespirax...

[Bard of Twilight]

In one game,I was playing against Mech-Guard riding Vendettas.My Rune Priest landed with his Pod,behind the enemy lines.I successfully casted Living Lightning, rolling it to be an assault 6 weapon.I had perfect view of one of his Squadrons' rear Armour,and so ,smiling wickedly I start rolling the dice to-Hit.Well I managed to roll 4 "1"s and 2 "2"s.My Rune Priest never got the chance to retry...



In another battle,my Death Company was butchering a Squad of Thousand Sons, with Ahriman, until my opponent had a stroke of genius, and turned Lemartes into Chaos Spawn,which wiped out single-handed the rest of my Death Company.From this day, whenever my friend notices Lemartes, he starts speaking of "these fine Imperial Spawns, that always get the Job done".

[Wolfshade]

1. BA vs. Guard. Combat tactical squad are sat on top of a bastion with missile launcher. Valkyrie moves and stops about 1" in front of the building, the missile marine cannot see anything else but the Valkyrie. He shoots and misses. Valkyrie opens fire and causes no unsaved wounds. Missile marine fires and misses. This missile marine continues to miss very large targets at point blank range in many, many games :(

2. BA vs. Nids. Flyrant being annoyed by a 5 man scout squad with sniper rifles. Flyrant assaults the squad, kills all but the sargeant who pokes the flyrant in the eye with his rifle causing a wound, combat is lost but doesn't run. My turn, the flyrant and scout go on with the scout causing a 2nd wound for no return. The next round the scout sargent luck runs out.

3. BA vs Smurfs. Mephiston casts wings of sanguinius double 1 and takes a wound, lands on difficult terrain and takes a wound, fires plasma pistol at tactical squad which then gets hot and takes another wound. Less than impressed...

[Bard of Twilight]

3. BA vs Smurfs. Mephiston casts wings of sanguinius double 1 and takes a wound, lands on difficult terrain and takes a wound, fires plasma pistol at tactical squad which then gets hot and takes another wound. Less than impressed...

:D:D:DI always thought that the "Lord of Death" nickname was given to him due to his extreme combat prowess, not his attempts to commit suicide during battle...:D

[LordGrise]

One of my fave moments was playing a bud of mine, my Tau vs his Chaos Marines. Turn Three, his Demon Prince comes out. Next round he's gonna melee my HQ, and the dominoes will start to fall. But if I can whack him this round...

The DP recieves the full faith and credence of approximately NINETEEN HUNDRED points of Tau: crisis suit teams, My HQ guys, two railheads, so on and so forth, and saves absolutely everything. End of the shooting phase, I'm looking for straws to clutch at - I got one group of Fire Warriors in cover at the end of the table. What the heck... hah, only one of 'em is in range. So I crack the joke that he's shooting blindly over the wall before I roll.

Damned if he didn't get the one and only hit of the game on that Demon Prince. Dink!

After that I got my butt handed to me in the usual manner. But when I got home that particular FW got his bloodstripe (thin crimson pinstripe up the side of his thighs). I use him as my Fire Warrior commander now, and the story still gets told when me and Chris are in the store at the same time.

[bradpowers]

Was playing BA against my buddy who does DE. My last squad, and assault squad with priest, charges his unit of 5 wyches and Vect. Despite my furious charge, I was going last all around. Everything but two melta gunners, the priest, and the Power fist sergeant died. My priest and two melta gunners, through a miracle of sixes, manage to kill all 5 wyches, despite their cc invul. My sergeant, in base to base with Vect absolutely must kill him to win the game. I'm on pins and needles. Successfully rolled to hit and wound. Waiting for the 2+ invul, he rolls it... right off the table. I'm sweating bullets at this point. He rolls it again, was cracked (damn Realm of Battle Board!). Then, he rolls it, and at the last moment it flips over to a one, winning me the game with 4 models. I shout so loudly that everyone in the store pauses to stare!

Sanguinius helped me out that night...

[Wolfshade]

Not quite as amusing as Mephiston killing himself but another one has just sprung (sprang?(spronged?)) to mind.

BA (WD codex) v Eldar Appoc. (possibly even 4th ed.) - In the 2nd turn my death company dreadnought charged a 10 man squad of dire avengers with exarch (+defend) for 3 turns they trade blows without any real advantage to eitherside (IIRC the Dire Avengers couldn't damage the Dread.) finally on my opponents 5th turn (last turn of the game) the dread wins the combat and breaks the Dire Avengers who flee and are destroyed. Dred consolidates, moves and assaults a squad of striking scorpions who are sitting on the only uncontested objective. Dread kills one in combat they broke and run so couldn't contest the objective.